


Dark Craving

by Tien



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Body Horror, Cannibalism, M/M, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2017-12-21
Packaged: 2018-07-28 21:25:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 25,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7657297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tien/pseuds/Tien
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Returning to the idea that the perks mutate the body, I'm doing the cannibal perk.<br/>This time there's the added fun of the survival mode affect of the "Dark Craving" which is what the focus of this fic will be.</p><p>Nate's had a secret that he's carried with him from before the bombs dropped. He's been dangerously curious and obsessed with what human meat tastes like. Waking up in the wasteland just gave him the opportunity to indulge in this curiosity. However eating the flesh of other humans is still very much a taboo, even in the fallout of total nuclear annihilation. Turns out there's a very good reason why it's still regarded as more than an alternate diet. Nate's going to find out the hard way why people shouldn't eat each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Alternative Diet

It was easy for them to turn a blind eye to Nate’s newfound wasteland snack. Both Hancock’s “do what you gotta” attitude and MacCready’s own wasteland struggles made them the perfect enablers. In retrospect, they both realized that their lack of judgment allowed things to get so bad. 

At first it was just one corpse, a few strips of meat cut away from the flesh and hastily shoved into his mouth. The first time Hancock and MacCready walked around a corner and caught him in the act he looked genuinely embarrassed and scared. Both companions just winced and turned their backs. “You uh, you enjoy that one, it’s all yours,” Hancock said through tight lips. 

MacCready looked away and said, “Yeah, tuck in buddy, I’ll uh, I’ll be in the next room.” Nate looked from his friends to the corpse and back again before taking another few strips and eating them. He figured he might as well finish what he started.

After waking up two hundred years in the post-apocalyptic future Nate was surprised to learn that even though murder, slavery, looting, arson and kidnapping were all alive and well, cannibalism was still very much a taboo. The first time they came across a raider compound that decided to indulge in that sort of behavior he was surprised at the harsh negative reaction Nick and Piper had. They had to wait a full five minutes before Piper’s stomach stopped turning and she wasn’t going to throw up. Nick just seemed equal parts disgusted and disappointed. But Nate couldn’t muster up the disgust.

He was beginning to think something was wrong with him. No, not beginning, more like finally realizing something was wrong with him. Nate always figured that when the walls of society came crashing down there would be more people who thought the way he did. That meat was meat, and the taboo just added to the sweetness. But now that he was actually inside the world where society had fallen and seen that no, people still find that disgusting, well, maybe he was disgusting. Maybe he was wrong.

He never talked about the strange urges he had. When he was a kid growing up he figured everyone must wonder what people taste like. Chicken? Everything tastes like chicken after all. Maybe pork? He couldn’t see people tasting like cows or deer, but pigs seemed reasonable. But as he grew older and the thoughts never fell away he began to realize that maybe they weren’t as normal as he thought they were. Nate knew how society dealt with cannibals and he knew it was disgusting and wrong. He also knew that if given the chance he would absolutely cave and give into his curiosity. 

That chance was finally given to him one afternoon. They were clearing out a rather large raider compound. He had instructed Preston and Codsworth to head to the other side while he and Hancock cleared out the raiders in the front of the building. He saw someone crouching behind a wall in a secluded area of the warehouse. They didn’t see him. A quick headshot ended that raider’s life and like any other normal kill Nate went to loot the body. The raider was wearing hardly any armor. His breath caught in his throat when he leaned over the corpse to dig through the pouch strapped to his waist. There was a combat knife in among the caps, and Nate pulled it out to examine it. 

It was then he felt it, something stirring in the back of his mind. A whisper, an urge, a dare. “Go on,” it cooed. “Nobody’s watching and you’ve always been so curious.” And he was curious, so damn curious. Nate stood and checked the warehouse; he could hear gunshots from far away. Part of him wanted to take the caps and bullets and go help his friends, but the other part of him saw a golden opportunity he might not ever for a long time. So he backed up, shut the door, wedged a chair against the handle and went back to the body. 

The knife blade was well sharpened and easily carved through flesh on the raider’s arm. He peeled the skin back and cut a chunk of red muscle away from the limb. He held it in his hand, warm and wet. His hesitation wasn’t unexpected. This was something he’d never dreamed he’d be doing. He shook his head. No, that was a lie. He had dreamed about this, not this particular lead up, but the end result. The meat sat in his hand for another few moments while his brain went over the consequences of this action.

He decided that before his brain came up with a good excuse to bail he should just get it over with. Without chewing he shoved the piece of meat in his mouth and swallowed. At first all he tasted was copper from the blood. It wasn’t pleasant, but it wasn’t unpleasant either. Normally he cooked all his meat, but obviously there wasn’t time for that. He didn’t gag as the meat slid down his throat and that only excited him. It was the same feeling he got as a kid when he was doing something he knew was wrong. Like taking a cookie from the cookie jar before dinner. Nate grinned at the comparison and dug the knife back into the cookie jar and sliced out another fleshy cookie.

When he wiped the blood from his mouth and stepped back from the corpse his stomach was pleasantly full of his secret sin. There was a brief moment of shame, of guilt, that flooded through him. He had eaten the flesh of another human. But it was a secret, one that only he would ever know about. There’d be no way to tell he did this. Even if one of his fellow companions found the body today there’d be no link to Nate having anything to do with the mutilation.

Raiders do shit like this after all. Well respected generals do not. He’d be safe.

Safe. He licked his lips, smiled and walked out of that room, confident that his curiosity had be sated and he’d be able to move past this gross fascination. 

Nothing was ever that simple, and only a few days later he found himself over another corpse. The desire burned deep within his gut and he just knew he wasn’t walking away without tasting another mouthful of fresh meat. It was an exciting game he started playing. During a firefight he’d locate a raider that was away from the others, shoot it, then drag the corpse somewhere out of view. There he’d grab a few desperate, rushed; exhilarating bites, and be back in the fray moments later. 

He couldn’t tell if it was just his imagination or not, but after eating from another person he felt stronger, the wounds he had hurt less and he was filled with energy. He was almost certain it was just his mind playing tricks on him, or the adrenalin from getting away with another gruesome act. 

The game he played was dangerous, some of his companions he knew would be disgusted if they ever caught him. That worry was always hovering in the back of his mind, but it couldn’t override the thrill and pleasure of stripping meat off of a corpse during or after a battle. He was walking on a tight rope, where his respect and character were his balance. One false step and he’d plummet into disgrace. 

His heart nearly stopped when he heard MacCready and Hancock open the door to the room he was in. His back was to them, so all they could see was the corpse. He prayed they’d assume he was just looting and leave him be, but that wasn’t the case. After a month and a half of playing hide and go seek he was finally found. Once they realized what was happening they both turned and left, giving him privacy. His once dead heart was now hammering in his chest, and anxiety made his blood run cold but sweat bead on his skin. 

The two people he cared about the most and loved beyond all else saw him eating a dead body. They didn’t say it outright, but he could hear the disgust in their voices. Nate wiped his chin and picked the caps off of the corpse and box of ammo, .38, useless in any of their guns but it’d bring in a few more caps. Even after being discovered his mind still thought about caps, there was definitely something wrong with him. He stood on shaking legs and walked out of the room. 

Hancock was leaning against a wall and MacCready was counting caps on a stool. “Hey, uh, we should head out.” Nate knew his voice was wobbling as much as his legs. 

Hancock and MacCready looked up. They saw Nate’s pale skin and wide, scared eyes. They exchanged a look and Hancock broke into an easy smile and smooth reply, “Sure, sure. Lead the way.” 

“I managed to nab like, 80 caps,” MacCready said, sliding off the stool. “That’s enough to buy a round of drinks at a bar.” 

Relief washed over Nate and he laughed, the laugh broke into a sob and he pulled ahead of the others, trying to get a hold of himself. MacCready was quick to catch up and throw an arm around Nate. “Hey, hey, no need for that,” MacCready said.

Nate wiped his face but the water wouldn’t stop. “How can you both be ok with what you saw?” 

“Uhh, well, ok isn’t the word I’d use,” MacCready said. “But we both agreed it’s none of our business what your diet decides to include.” 

Hancock stood on Nate’s other side; his arm wrapped itself around Nate’s waist. “While you were finishing up we decided that we aren’t going to judge you.”

“You should though; you should judge the hell out of me.”

Hancock shrugged. “Ok,” he said. “Here’s my judgement: You’re a great guy Nate. You really fucking care about the Commonwealth. You’re building communities and bringing families together.” 

MacCready cut in, “You saved me from myself, there’s nothing I could ever do to repay that. And not just me, you saved Duncan’s life too.” 

“Not to mention you gave a ghoul like me a chance.”

“I kill people for a living,” MacCready said. “That didn’t change your opinion of me.” 

“You saw past our flaws, you saw us, I think we are capable of doing the same thing. We’d be pretty shitty husbands if we couldn’t.” 

This, unsurprisingly, did not help Nate stop sobbing, but at least he knew he wasn’t going to be alone. The biggest thought that circled his mind as they walked back to the settlement was that he did not deserve either of them. 

True to MacCready’s earlier statement, he bought drinks for all of them. It was a small bar, below an inn in a settlement that Nate helped build up, but it served liquor all the same. They spent the evening hours drinking away their concerns over grilled radstag and boiled vegetables. 

Much later that night Hancock found himself supporting for his two human lovers; they really couldn’t hold their liquor like he could. He half dragged half carried MacCready and Nate up the stairs to their room. Neither of them would get sick, but goddamn they both got a bad case of jelly legs. He deposited them on the bed and started shrugging off clothing. Someone whistled when his shirt slid over his head, probably Nate. Mac was focused on the wall like it was the most important thing he’d ever gazed upon. Hancock knew that look well from when he was human, that was clearly the look of someone who thought, “If I stare hard enough at this picture frame the world will stop spinning.” It never did. 

He pulled off Nate’s boots and got MacCready a can of purified water. The kid was going to have one hell of a headache come tomorrow. It was never a good idea to try to keep pace with a ghoul, in chems or alcohol. “Either of you gonna hurl?” 

“No,” Nate said lying back on the terrible mattress. He would kill for a mattress with proper supports. 

“Probably not,” MacCready replied and scooted against the wall. “Just need to drink this and maybe take a leak.” 

“Just don’t piss on my stuff and we’re fine.” 

“Don’t worry; I’ll aim for Nate’s.” 

“You will not,” Nate murmured. Eyes half closed. “Hey,” he said, and hoped his voice wasn’t too slurred. “Thanks for understanding and not throwing me to the curb… I mean it,” he added. And he did, this wasn’t the booze talking. Nate was never more grateful to have MacCready and Hancock beside him.

“Hey, we all got our bad habits Sunshine.”

“Yeah,” MacCready said, his words definitely not as sober as Nate’s. He swung the can of purified water around. “Some people smoke, or drink, gamble, or do boatloads of jet. And some people feast on raw human flesh. That’s totally on the same level.” 

“I’d cook it if I could but…” Nate trailed off; even drunk he knew he was digging a hole.

Hancock slid into the bed, forcing Nate to move over. “Enough talk out of the two of you,” he said hitting the light switch. “Nate you know we love you, that’s all you need to know.”

“Y-Yeah, I didn’t mean to sound like I didn’t!” MacCready said and tossed the can aside. He moved to lie down and put an arm over Nate. “It’s just gross, that’s all, the whole human eating thing. But you’re not gross! I mean, you’re sorta gross, but we’re all sorta gross. I mean, ah hell…” 

“Mac,” Hancock mumbled from Nate’s other side. “Shut up and go to sleep.”

“You said hell,” Nate laughed.

Hancock groaned and pulled the threadbare blanket over all three of them. “This is the last night I let you two talk me into a drinking contest.” 

Now that Nate had a shallow form of approval from MacCready and Hancock he didn’t feel the same desire to hide that he felt before. He still took the bodies out of the line of sight, and he didn’t make a big deal about what he was doing. There was just an added amount of comfort now that he didn’t have to rush or be afraid. Hancock and MacCready would give Nate a few extra moments after each battle to do his thing. It’s not like there weren’t other things to do after every fight. There were items to loot and sort, guns to oil, caps to collect and count. They kept busy. 

Of course there was unease between the two, it didn’t sit well with them, what Nate was doing in private, but it wasn’t worth ruining their relationship. It wasn’t worth destroying the best thing that had ever happened to either one of them. They kept it between the three of them as well. They knew that most of their friends would have very drastic reactions to Nate’s newfound taste. Hancock got Nate to agree to only do it around them, never anyone else. He didn’t think the risk was worth it, and thankfully Nate agreed. 

“It’s not like I have to do this all the time,” Nate said. “I’m not like…” He struggled with the words to explain it. “I don’t know, it’s not like I need it or anything. My life isn’t in danger if I skip over a few bodies. I just…like the taste I guess.” His eyes moved to the floor. “God, I’m sorry. You both married a freak.” 

Hancock put his hat on Nate’s head. “Knock it off sunshine,” he said. “I said it once, I’ll say it again. You and me, that’s my kind of freak show.”

“Heck, Hancock makes more human eating jokes than the actual cannibal.” 

“Mac I’m not a…” He stopped his defense. MacCready was right, there wasn’t anything else he could be called. 

“Ghouls get free passes to make those jokes,” Hancock said, shifting the subject. “It’s revenge for all the zombie comments.” 

“I never understood that,” Nate spoke up. “Like, your skin isn’t smooth, I get that, but it’s more like a burn than anything else…and you don’t smell any worse than Mac.”

“Hey!” They all laughed. MacCready looked from Hancock to Nate before saying, “Sometime, I’ll take you into the Capital Wasteland. The ghouls there are… well; you’d understand the zombie slur that’s for sure.” 

“Are they really that different?” 

Hancock shook his head. “No, at our core, we’re all the same. Over irradiated humans who weren’t lucky enough to die. Us Commonwealth ghouls, and probably the ghouls from further up north too, got a slightly better deal than our brothers and sisters down south. Maybe the bombs here were different? Maybe the climate or atmosphere changed something, but we’re…better preserved is a way to put it.” 

“The ghouls of the Capital Wasteland are literally missing chunks of flesh,” MacCready said. “And god they’re treated like shit because of it.” He made a mental note to avoid saying shit, but he thought the topic warranted it. “Sure the people of the Commonwealth are prejudice but… you never hear the types of insults here that you do back home. How many times have you actually heard someone call a ghoul a zombie? And how many times has a ghoul used the term smoothskin as an actual insult? One of the biggest culture shocks I got was seeing how these folks treated the ghouls.” 

Hancock nodded. “They aren’t as popular as human travelers, but I’ve met a few Capital Wasteland ghouls in my time, and I will never forget the look of pure relief that they gave me when I said I wasn’t going to yell at them, or hit them. I just…” Hancock balled his fists. “We’re just like everyone else damn it. Breaks my heart to hear the horror stories.” 

“The more I learn about this world, the more I wish humanity hadn’t survived sometimes.” 

“Speaking of culture shock,” MacCready said. “I can’t imagine how you must feel. We grew up in this environment, this is normal, but you… It’s a miracle eating corpses was the only bad habit you developed.” 

“Well, if I’m being honest, I wanted to do that prewar too. The human eating thing, I mean.” He felt his face get hot after finally admitting that to someone. “There was never the option back then though, so I kept it to myself.” He gave a shy grin and said, “Probably for the best right? I would have been locked away somewhere instead of frozen in a vault. Never would have met you two.” 

“I’d advise you to keep that between us,” Hancock said. “Plenty of folks would love to make your life hell if they heard you say that.” 

MacCready agreed. “You aren’t some merc, or drifter, you’re the general of the Minutemen.”

“I know, I know,” Nate said. “There’s a world of expectation riding on me and my appearance.” He adjusted the heavy backpack on his shoulders. “I kept it a secret my whole life, I’m sure I can keep it up. But, it does feel good to know I don’t have to hide anything from you two. I don’t deserve that. Don’t deserve you guys.” 

“You sure as shit do Sunshine,” Hancock said. “And stop saying and thinking you don’t.” 

“You only uh, eat raiders and gunners and I guess, that’s uh, ok, er better, I guess,” MacCready stumbled out awkwardly. He caught Nate’s eyes and watched them fall. “I’m trying,” he offered. “I really am.” MacCready reached for Nate’s hand and squeezed it. “Gonna take some time, but I’m not leaving your side.” 

\---

It was a peaceful day in Sanctuary, as far as wasteland days go. Not a cloud in the robin’s egg colored sky. Nate was out back behind his house, the side door open to air out the place. He was standing over a grill and large drying rack. Spices in the post apocalypse were scarce but Nate managed. Some of the new stuff was very interesting too, apparently hubflower leaves could be ground and used to add flavor but Nate found it too bitter for meat. Blood leaf was surprisingly spicy and made a nice stand in for pepper. Thankfully salt was still an easily acquired thing and the giant garlic cloves he dug up just north of Sanctuary acted just like their pre-war counterparts, if a bit stronger. That all made jerky a food that he not only knew how to make, but could keep on making in this new world.

Nate was always proud of his homemade jerky recipe. It was a big hit with the neighbors and continued to be a hit with his companions. It just needed a few tweaks. Radstag and brahmin made the best jerky, but mole rat meat and dog worked as well. Insect meat just didn’t dry right and every batch he made tasted disgusting. Not even Dogmeat would eat it. 

The grill was loaded with a wide selection of radstag cuts that he was pre-heating before he moved them to the makeshift smoker he made. Things were much easier pre-war but none of Nate’s old cooking equipment seemed to have survived, besides the remnants of one of his grills. He had turned to cooking when he returned from the war, it helped to keep him busy, and Nora certainly didn’t complain. 

The drying racks held a different selection of meat, his special meat. Eating bodies raw was starting to get a bit disgusting. He’d still do it, he didn’t know why, especially now that he had an alternative. But he couldn’t seem to hold back a few bites of fresh human meat. However, when he was done eating he’d cut off chunks and pack them away in a salt rub, just like with the other animals they butchered out in the field. He was careful to leave bits of hide stuck to the animal cuts so that he and the others knew what was in each pack. That way when he started smoking and preserving meat no one would get confused. When the human strips were seasoned to Nate’s liking he’d lay them out on the drying racks. Things would go much faster if he had a dehumidifier, but he couldn’t track one down in the ransacked stores. He stayed hopeful though. His usual recipe worked quite well for his special jerky and it made a very tasty snack while they were out on the road. 

Nate was usually the one who carried the food on their travels, he was known not only for being a hoarder but also for being very organized. He kept two pouches of jerky in his pack, one green and one red. The green bag held normal animal jerky and the red bag was his special blend. The separate colors were a lifesaver when most meat after smoked and seasoned looked identical to each other.

“Smells good, what’s on the menu?” MacCready asked strolling into the backyard. 

“I was thinking roasted radstag with boiled tatos and carrots,” Nate replied, turning the meat on the grill. “That ok with you?” 

“Perfect.” He wandered over to the table that had the finished jerky from the last batch that Nate was working on. 

MacCready picked up a few pieces from the tray and walked back over. Before he could pop one in his mouth Nate said, “The stuff on that table’s for me, yours is on the counter in the kitchen.” He laughed as MacCready stared at the meat in his hand like it would suddenly grow sharp teeth and bite him. “Pass it here before you drop it,” Nate said with a smile. He handed it over brushing his hands on his pant leg. “You should try it sometime, it’s actually pretty good,” Nate joked and chewed on the dried meat. “Tastes like pork.” 

“What is pork? I see it on those bean cans, but what is it?” 

“Pig? You know, curly tail, likes mud, has a big nose?” MacCready stared at him. “Wow, ok, no radhogs then.”

“I’ve heard the word pig, but I didn’t think it was an animal. They were farm creatures?” 

Nate nodded. “Yup, along with chickens, sheep, cows, goats, some people ate horses too.” Nate flipped the meat and thought back to the days he spent at a friend’s dairy farm. Those were the days, he thought wistfully. 

“Must have been nice not having to eat to giant bugs,” MacCready said. He left and returned with the jerky that Nate had promised him was on the counter. “You’re a great cook, you know that? I haven’t eaten so well in…ever.” 

“I take it things weren’t the best in Little Lamplight?” 

He shrugged. “We were kids, we ate what we had, and what we had wasn’t much. Once I left I scrounged around, you’d be amazed at how much food was still left in the ruined houses. But that made me sick more often than not. Later Lucy cooked, then I was…back on my own again. Learned a few things, but nothing great.” 

“I never used to like cooking,” Nate admitted. “Then I came back from the battlefield and I just… needed something to distract me. There was a food shortage just before the bombs fell, but I don’t know, sometimes, looking back it felt like a fairy tale. People all over were struggling for rations yet we seemed untouched in our little white picket fenced sanctuary.” Nate shifted uneasily, and finished, “The point of the story is that I got good at cooking.” 

MacCready moved closer and rested his head on Nate’s shoulder and wrapped his arms around his chest. “Thank god one of us can cook, or we’d be eating Mac’ and Cheese and unseasoned radroach out there.” 

\---

Nate heard the door open and close behind him. “Something wrong?” He asked and turned his head to look at MacCready who flinched. Neither of his friends liked walking in on him when they knew he was eating. So something must be up. 

“N-No, nothing is wrong, I just wanted a word with you…” he added, “alone.” 

“Ok,” Nate said and moved to stand. He walked over to his pack and took out a rag to wipe his face with. “What’s on your mind?” 

“I uh, I just think maybe you should slow down on the corpse eating thing,” he said and rubbed the back of his neck. Everything about this conversation was awkward for him. 

“Slow down?” Nate pulled out one of his sharp hunting knives and set to work cutting off pieces of flesh to season later. “I’ve only had like one or two kills I think that’s pretty-“ 

“One or two?” MacCready interrupted. “Try seven in just these past five days!” 

“What? No…” Nate stared down at the mutilated body of the raider under him. “That can’t be right…” 

MacCready sighed and leaned against the door. “I wasn’t…I wasn’t going to say anything but I’m getting worried.” His eyes looked out through the dirty glass at no one and he continued. “Hancock and I agreed we weren’t going to give you any shi-trouble over this. But you’ve been getting…obsessive? Yeah I’d say obsessive recently.” 

That didn’t make any sense to Nate; he shook his head and looked back up at MacCready. He searched his face for any traces that this was a joke, but he couldn’t find any. “I…Mac you’d think I’d remember killing and eating someone.”

“You’d think,” He said a bit too cold, a bit too bluntly for his liking. He swallowed and tried again. “That’s why I decided to have this little talk with you. I don’t think you’re aware of it, maybe it’s become a habit, or something worse, I don’t know. But you… sometimes you aren’t subtle and one of us will walk up on you just going to town.” 

Nate gave it some more thought. He really tried to remember the past few days, what they did and where they’d been. There were plenty of run ins with raiders and gunners between Goodneighbor and Diamond City, their current goal. The more he thought about it the more he realized that he did sample someone from each attack. “Oh god,” he said, his eyes widening. “I…that is a lot of people.” 

“Twice in one day if I remember correctly.” 

“And you do,” Nate confirmed. “I guess…I really hadn’t noticed just how many it’s been.” He pressed a hand to his forehead and sighed. “Thanks for talking to me Mac. I’ll try to cut back,” and with those words he stood from the body and packed up his things. There was more than enough meat in his pack and he had enough jerky for weeks. MacCready was right; he had been overhunting and not even noticed. 

“That’s all I’m asking,” MacCready said, though he had hoped to hear Nate say he’d stop for good. That, however, was something he doubted he’d be hearing. They let Nate indulge and now he didn’t think there was anything that could stop him. 

Nate and MacCready joined Hancock in what was once the lobby of an apartment building. The ghoul was leaning against a pillar twirling a knife between his fingers. “Bored are we?” Nate asked.

“Very,” he said with a grin. “Almost died out here from it. You sure know how to torture a ghoul.”

“Don’t worry, I think I know something to cure that boredom of yours before it becomes terminal.” 

Hancock arched an eyebrow, or what would be an eyebrow if he still had hair. He walked smoothly forward and grabbed a bottle of Nuka Cola from a tabletop. He pressed it between himself and Nate before the other man could lean in for a kiss. “Not so fast Meat Mouth, rinse.” 

Nate groaned and took the bottle, popping the top and taking a few swigs. He even exaggerated swishing the liquid between his teeth. He hated to think about what this was doing to his enamel. It was so hard maintaining his prewar teeth without routine dentist visits. “We good?” 

Hancock took out a tin and placed and a small pink tablet on his palm. “And the Mentat.” 

Nate rolled his eyes and put the tablet on his tongue. “I’m gonna get addicted to this crap if you keep this up.” 

“That’s what Addictol is for sweetheart.” When Hancock was thoroughly convinced that Nate didn’t taste like a corpse he went in for the kiss. “Much better, I like the taste of berry on your lips.” 

Nate grinned in the kiss and wrapped an arm around Hancock’s back. “I’ll pick up a pack of mutfruit next time I’m in town if you want that so bad.” 

“I’d like that,” MacCready piped up, “for different reasons however.” He slid up to Nate and Hancock only to get his hat pulled over his head with a laugh.

\--- 

The group started back north towards Sanctuary after making a quick stop at Diamond City and Hangman’s Alley. They set up a temporary camp just off the side of the road for a quick rest. It had been about thirty minutes since the group had finished eating lunch when MacCready heard Nate vomiting into the bushes away from camp. He walked over and put a hand on Nate’s back. “You ok?” 

Nate wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. “I don’t know, I can’t keep anything down.” MacCready helped him back to camp, they walked slowly, but oddly Nate didn’t feel bad. The intense nausea always faded right after he emptied his gut. “You feel sick?” Nate asked. He was hoping it was mutual and they all ate something bad a few days ago. 

“No, I feel fine.” MacCready made him sit by the fire and he tossed him a purified water and a package of antibiotics. 

Nate wasn’t really sold on the idea of the new wave of medicine that had been hitting the market. There was too much that could go wrong, but the antibiotics and herbal remedies now being stocked by traders made the others feel better, so he took them. Later he’d ask Curie to examine several sources of these new medicines to see how effective they actually were. He took the medicine and chased it with a few gulps of water. The water helped settle the acidic state of his stomach and put something in there to make him feel like he had eaten. But he knew the feeling would pass and he’d have to try to eat something again. 

They were still a few days walk from the nearest minutemen controlled settlement. He guessed it would take them even longer if he was actually getting sick. The constant stops so he could purge his stomach were taking up valuable daylight, and energy. Nate was exhausted and it was only two in the afternoon. “I’ll be good to keep moving soon, we can break down camp.” There wasn’t much to be broken down, only a single bedroll and some cooking supplies. The smell of used cooking oil made Nate gag, but he kept the water down. No sense wasting the medication he just took.

“I don’t know,” Hancock said approaching the camp. He was out doing patrols. “You look like shit Nate. Maybe we should stop here for the day.” 

“It’s only two in the afternoon,” Nate protested. “We can’t lose another day because I feel pukey. Big deal, I threw up, I’ll live.” 

“I know you’ll live Love, that’s not the concern here.” Hancock folded his arms and stared at him. “You might be getting sick, you might not, but if we push you when you’re weak you’ll definitely come down with something.” 

“Ok,” Nate said, trying to strike a compromise. “How about we pack up and continue on for a few more hours, but we set up camp again earlier than normal?” 

“Just agree with him Hancock it’ll be easier on all of us. You know how stubborn he can be. Let him get sick if that’s what he wants.” 

“It’s not that I want to get sick,” Nate said. “But I don’t want to stay out here longer than we have to. Each day in the wastes is another day we could be killed.”

MacCready huffed, “What? You don’t think we can protect ourselves? I survived for years on my own in the Capital Wasteland, I think between Hancock and I we’ll be fine.” 

“I’ve no doubt in your survival skills Mac,” Nate said and picked the bedroll off the ground. “It’s just that anything can happen out here, even the most prepared can end up on the bad side of a raider pole.” 

Hancock scraped the remaining cooking oil and bits of charred molerat into the fire pit. The sudden flare up of cooked meat made Nate’s stomach turn and he bolted for the bushes again. His companions gave him sympathetic glances and grabbed their packs when he returned moments later. 

The vomiting didn’t let up. Once again, almost as if on cue, they could hear Nate throwing up after dinner. The poor guy didn’t even make it ten minutes before he was sent running from the fire. “I think something is wrong with Nate,” MacCready said to Hancock. “He’s only been able to keep down a few strips of jerky a day and water. It’s been like, three days of this.” 

Hancock nodded, something was up, he just didn’t know what. “Maybe he just picked up a nasty stomach bug? I mean you guys did just take your dose of rad away, we all know what a bitch that is on your immune systems.” 

“True, true, but…I don’t know, Hancock, I think this is more than a stomach bug.” He winced when he heard Nate heave some more. “He doesn’t have a fever, he’s not in pain, no body aches…”

“Unless he’s lying to us,” Hancock pointed out.

“I’m not lying to you!” Nate called back between retches. 

Before Nate came back Hancock cleared away all traces of dinner, including the pans and leftover food. They didn’t want to trigger another round of throwing up. When Nate finally did come back he sat down and leaned his head on MacCready’s shoulder. “How you feeling?” 

“Tired.” Nate replied. “This sucks,” he added. “I don’t feel sick, you know? I’m not chilled, I’m not running a fever, I don’t even have a headache. I just…my stomach does not want food in it.” He sighed. “I like eating too much for this bullshit.” 

“Think it was something you ate?” 

Nate shrugged. “I dunno, maybe? We’ve been all eating pretty much the same things for the past week.”

“Not…entirely,” MacCready said realizing something. “Your uh, habit…”

“Shit,” Hancock swore. “Why didn’t I think of that?” 

“Because we’ve done such a fantastic job of normalizing it,” MacCready replied with a hint of disgust and disappointment. “What if you picked whatever this is up off of one of those corpses you’re so fond of eating?” 

“I guess it’s a possibility,” Nate said honestly. “Sometimes I do eat it raw…” He groaned leaned even more on MacCready. “That’s probably it, there, case closed. It’s all my fault. I’ll just have to deal with feeling gross for the next few days until it passes. Then after that-“

“You’ll stop eating dead bodies?” MacCready guessed hopefully.

“No, I was going to say, “I’ll start cooking everything.””

MacCready frowned but shifted so Nate could be more comfortable against him. He ran a hand lazily through Nate’s hair. “Worth a shot,” he said. He’d bring up the suggestion as many times as he could. Maybe it wasn’t too late and Nate could go back to a regular diet. Something was gnawing at him; he just felt that this path Nate was walking was dangerous. Hancock didn’t seem too bothered, but the man ran one of the most dangerous towns in the Commonwealth. The ghoul was used to walking the line between murderer and benevolent leader. Of course his standards would be a bit swayed. 

But MacCready saw with different eyes. As a drifter for most of his life he didn’t have many allegiances. He developed a strong, personal, moral code that mostly involved self-preservation. But it also let him see everyone for who they were. When you spend your life caring only for yourself you get really good at picking up the good and bad in people. Right now Nate was still overflowing with good, and maybe, just maybe, this was just a bizarre quirk, but maybe it was also foreshadowing for something much darker. 

They let the fire die down, talking the night away. Mostly Nate just listened to Hancock and MacCready tell him stories of the wasteland. MacCready certainly had a lot of those. Hancock had a much tamer upbringing and all of his exciting stories came from the past ten years, after he became a ghoul. MacCready tried not to think about the fact that ten years ago he was still a baby faced mayor of a town of children. At least he was a badass little kid, but still just a kid. 

Nate would tell the occasional tale of life prewar, and if he was feeling up to it, stories about his family. It was much easier to get him to talk about his time as a soldier. Fighting was a familiar topic and didn’t change over the centuries. War, as Nate always liked to say, war never changes. However, the vault dweller was much more content and interested in hearing about the new world. 

Eventually the conversation slowed and everyone’s eyes were drawn to the glowing embers. “I think we should turn in,” Hancock said and stood up. 

“Come on.” MacCready pushed Nate off of his chest and they both started to lay out their sleeping bags. Nate unzipped his all the way and laid it down first. MacCready and Hancock followed his example and set theirs on top, creating a makeshift set of blankets. They had started sleeping together a few months ago; the added closeness let everyone rest easier. Especially Nate, the man struggled with nightmares sometimes. “I’ll take middle,” MacCready said. “You’ll have easier access to escape if you feel sick if you’re not trapped between us.” 

“I’m not going to be sick, it’s only after eating that I get nauseous,” Nate replied but took the outer position anyways. He wasn’t about to complain, he could survive one night of not being the center of affection. He kicked off his boots and jacket. Completely undressing was dangerous in the wastes. If they were attacked he’d much rather have pants on and not be naked. His partners agreed, there was plenty of time to get intimate inside the safety of the settlement walls. “Night you guys, I’m probably going to pass right out.” 

“What,” Hancock said teasingly, “no pillow talk?” 

“Not tonight,” Nate laughed. “Just sleep, sorry.” He didn’t want to worry anyone but he was starting to feel gross again. Not nauseous but a headache was creeping in and his throat felt a bit tight. He just wanted to slip into unconsciousness and hope it went away in his sleep. 

MacCready and Hancock were light sleepers, you had to be to stay alive, but MacCready was far easier to wake. Especially out in the wastes. He might grumble and complain about getting up in the morning, but the slightest sound could wake him in the middle of the night. So it was no surprise that his eyes opened when he heard Nate shift and groan before rolling out of the covers. The next thing he heard was his husband coughing and the sound of liquid hitting the dirt. MacCready sat up and rubbed his eyes. Nate was just visible in the dull light of the dying fire. He was on all fours, coughing, and a string of drool hung from his lips. “You ok?” He said, crawling over to put a hand on his back. “Sick again?” 

Nate didn’t reply, he just stayed focused on the ground. His whole body was ready to convulse. He took a shallow, shaky breath which triggered another coughing fit. His stomach betrayed him once more and he threw up the remaining water and bile in his gut and kept coughing. He was vaguely aware of MacCready’s hand on his back and voice in his ear. 

“Holy shit, that’s blood,” MacCready said when he saw the liquid’s reflection in the dim firelight. “Hancock!” He called, waking the ghoul. “Nate’s throwing up blood.” 

“Shit,” Hancock knelt on Nate’s other side. “That can’t be good.” There was quite a bit of liquid on the ground. Not all of it blood, but a good deal of it. Nate coughed again, hard and his body seized. “Nate? Nate! Love, no! Shit.” Hancock rolled his body to the side and tried to keep him from thrashing into the fire. 

“What’s going on?” MacCready asked, his eyes full of fear of concern. 

“I don’t know, I don’t know.” 

Nate’s vision drifted in and out as his body shook and his fingers dug into the dirt, finally his eyes managed to focus on a dead tree a few yards away. He took a breath and coughed again, this time his mouth filled with a taste he knew all too well. Blood. He spat it out, only to have it fill again. Nate propped himself up with one elbow and continued to spit out blood, only now he noticed something else besides liquid on the ground in front of him. He picked one of the objects up with a trembling hand.

“Are those…teeth?” MacCready asked looking from Nate to the dull white object coated in blood. 

Hancock watched as Nate spit out more blood and teeth onto the ground. “The fuck?”

“Scared,” Nate managed to say through the blood. “I’m scared.” His words were hard to make out. MacCready gripped him tightly as he body shook one last time and he sat still. Blood still oozed from his mouth and dripped down his shirt. It looked like he just finished goring another person, but all the blood was his. It rolled off his chin in thick drops. 

“I think it’s over,” MacCready said, though they didn’t know exactly what “it” was. 

Hancock nodded and got up. He returned with a soft cloth and a couple bottles of water. “Let’s get you cleaned up Sunshine.” 

Nate felt the cloth run gently over his face. Hancock was being so careful with him, while MacCready rubbed small circles over the top of his hand. Fear was clearly present in all three of them. None of them knew what was going on. MacCready helped Nate out of his shirt and they put a new one on. “Hurts,” Nate managed to say. 

“Open your mouth,” Hancock instructed. Nate did and winced in the process. His whole face felt like it was on fire, but the worst was coming from his jaw and mouth. It was like he had just finished eating glass. When Hancock looked inside he didn’t know what to think. Nate was missing all of his front teeth, only a few molars sat in the back. He’d never seen anything like it. “Where does it hurt, love?” 

Nate pointed to the majority of his face. Tears were now pouring down from his eyes, not only from the pain but from the pure terror. He knew it wasn’t normal to suddenly lose teeth like that, and he knew it was equally abnormal for his body to reject all of the food he tried to feed it. Something was happening to him, and he no idea what it was.

MacCready echoed these fears when he said, “There’s something really wrong with Nate.”

“Yeah,” Hancock agreed.

Nate nodded. MacCready pressed his face to the back of Nate’s neck. “He needs a doctor, soon.” 

Hancock left and returned with an armful of injectables and more water. “I know you don’t like chems Nate, I know, but I think you’ll be able to forgive some Med-X. For the pain?” Nate gave him a weak nod of consent. Hancock gently pushed the plunger in and dispensed the chem. “This one you know and love,” he said a bit lighter and held up two stimpaks. “I’ll start with one and see how you feel from there.” Nate gave him another nod, without teeth he was finding it embarrassingly difficult to talk. “There’s some swelling starting in your jaw and throat, let me know if it becomes hard for you to breathe.” Already the medication was starting to take affect and Nate relaxed against MacCready’s chest. 

Nate motioned for the leftover water; he wanted to rinse out his mouth. On a normal occasion the taste of blood would be welcome. He was beginning to grow quite accustom to the coppery after taste of it. But this was not one of those times. There was so much of it that he felt ill. Having his teeth fall out didn’t help his appetite either. He swished the liquid around in his mouth and spit. He was beginning to feel more like himself again, a toothless version of himself, but still himself. The drugs were probably a major part of that. Stimpaks and Med-X were a hell of a combo. 

Hancock threw some more wood on the fire and brought it back to life. Nate’s eyes were starting to get heavy and he was drifting off to sleep. Scared or not, his body was exhausted and the pain medication made it all too easy for him to sleep. He felt strong arms pull him up and he was guided away from the pile of vomit, blood and teeth to the other side of the fire. “I’ll stay up with him Mac, you catch some shut eye.” 

MacCready wanted to argue but he was nearing his limits. He nodded numbly and dragged the blankets over to where Hancock was. The ghoul was sitting against a tree, the fire a good ways away, but still bright and hot. There was a bag of various chems sitting next to him. Nate was positioned against his chest and Hancock wrapped both arms around him protectively. MacCready draped one of the blankets over his shoulder and gave each man a quick kiss. “Watch over him,” he said.

“Couldn’t take my eyes off if I wanted to,” he replied. 

MacCready seemed satisfied and curled up in the other two blankets beside them. 

Throughout the night Nate would wake up, groaning in pain and Hancock would give him small booster shots of Med-X and sips of water. “You’ll be ok love,” he would whisper as Nate drifted back off to sleep. It was killing Hancock to watch Nate writhe in pain in his arms, knowing there wasn’t anything more he could do to help. So he held him tighter and rocked him gently through the night. He was getting good at feeling the signs of an incoming attack of pain. Nate would twitch, shudder and moan in his sleep before his eyes would snap open and he’d cry out in pain. 

When the sun was just starting to rise above the horizon Nate jolted awake and screamed. Hancock was quick to cover his toothless mouth and hush him. But not before MacCready sat up, concern written all over his tired face. Nate was panting but removed Hancock’s hand from his mouth. “Sorry,” he said quietly. “Hurts.” 

Hancock fished around for Med-X but not only were their supplies low, but he’d already given Nate way more than was normal. “Can you go without for a few hours?” 

Nate nodded, but a tear betrayed his strength. “I’ll be fine,” he managed. Without his top teeth some sounds were tricky to make, thankfully the roof of his mouth could be used as a stand in. 

“Do you need more rest? It’s still early.” 

Nate shook his head. He’d rather be up and moving around. Or at the very least doing something to occupy his mind. He didn’t want to think about last night, and what it meant. Hancock helped him to stand and he walked him to some bushes so he could pee. On their way back Nate gently probed his mouth with his tongue. He counted 14 of his teeth remained, which was more than he thought. It seemed like all of his molars and his two wisdom teeth remained. 

When he got back to the camp he knelt down and examined the pile of teeth on the ground. MacCready asked, “Anyone have any ideas on what this is?” Nate shook his head and picked up one of his teeth. He held it in his hand for a few moments before absentmindedly picking them up and placing them in his bag. “What about you Hancock? Is he going ghoul?” 

“No,” Hancock said with a fair amount of confidence. “I’m pretty sure I know the process,” he laughed. “The only thing that happened to my teeth was that the pointy ones got a little sharper. They never fell out.” 

“So…is it regular radiation poisoning?” 

Nate shook his head and said. “Rad away a few days ago, can’t be.” 

Hancock agreed. “And you’re not affected either, we’ve all been traveling together, no one’s left each other’s side since we started this trip. If Nate was affected you’d be too.” 

“So then it’s got to be what he ate,” MacCready concluded. “How many horrible diseases are passed through human flesh?” 

Hancock shrugged. Nate said, “I don’t know, but I don’t eat the brains.” 

“But you don’t cook anything,” MacCready said. “Lots of stuff can be transferred that way, nasty stuff.” He guided Nate to clean side of the fire and tossed a blanket over him. “We need to get you to a doctor as soon as possible. Get you cleaned out, stop this before it does any more damage.” 

Nate couldn’t disagree. Although the only pain he felt was in his jaw and mouth, last night scared him. Not being able to eat anything substantial in days and having his teeth fall out were cause for alarm. This wasn’t a normal stomach bug they were dealing with. Nate asked for a gun to clean and MacCready handed over Nate’s favorite rifle. It gave him something to do while the others broke down camp and set about making breakfast. They didn’t want to leave so early, it was still too dark for their liking. 

The smell of cooking meat was both enticing and sickening. His stomach growled and turned painfully from lack of food. “Can someone hand me my jerky?” 

“Nate, Love,” Hancock said, “you hardly have any teeth, how are you going to chew jerky?” 

“I still have back teeth, I’m hungry and I can only stomach the jerky.” Hancock gave in and tossed him the bag of jerky; he even made sure it was the red bag, just for Nate. “Thanks,” he said and opened the bag up. There was still a good bit of meat inside and Nate’s mouth watered automatically. He popped a piece in and chewed it very slowly. It hurt like hell and he had to take a few breaks before the meat softened enough to be swallowed. It felt like his stomach instantly attacked it for nutrients. After a few more laborious strips were swallowed he was starting to feel better. Not perfect, but functional. Amazing what a little food and water can do. 

They all picked up their packs and started back towards the road as soon it was light enough to see where they were going. Camping off the road was the smartest option; stick too close and anyone could stumble on your little camp. Of course more wildlife could wander in too, but the fire helped keep animals at bay and MacCready was confident he’d awake if even a twig snapped. 

Every ten minutes someone would ask Nate how he felt, and he was getting rather annoyed. “I’m fine,” he said for what seemed like the hundredth time. “Seriously guys, I’m good. I’ll let you know if I start feeling like shit, ok?” They continued on until Nate froze, not in pain but in caution. “Guy’s hold up,” before they could ask he whispered, “it’s not me; I think there’s people up ahead.” 

Everyone headed into the bushes on the side of the road; there were a few stalled cars between them and the group of people that were noisily walking towards them. “How’d you hear that before Hancock?” MacCready asked.

“I don’t know,” Nate whispered. “I just did.” They were silent as the group got closer. Raiders, they were definitely raiders. “We should engage,” Nate said quietly. He was already pulling out and loading his rifle. 

“But you’re in no condition to fight,” Hancock argued. 

Nate disagreed, “Bullshit I feel fine, and one less raider pack the better.” He quickly lined up his shot and blew a hole directly into the lead raider’s head. The others of course turned in all directions trying to figure out where the shot came from.

There were only six of them, easy pickings for the skilled team. MacCready quickly shot and killed two and Hancock broke cover to take down one, his shot gun didn’t have the same range that the rifles had. In the chaos of the battle, even one as small as this, they lost sight of Nate who had disappeared behind a rusted out Corvega. There was a raider crouched just a few feet away. Nate snuck slowly, his feet hardly making any sound. His rifle holstered behind his back and a long, sharp knife in his hand. In one quick fluid motion he wrapped a strong arm around the raider and slit his throat. The man gurgled to death, spraying blood against the pastel paintjob of the car. With the man bleeding out in his arms Nate quickly injected himself with half a dose of Med-X, his jaw burned, like his missing teeth were erupting. 

He ran a finger through his mouth and they touched several small, sharp points coming from his gums. Nate pushed the rest of the plunger into his arm. He could deal with any addiction later. This raider was wearing a set of leather armor over a dirty cotton shirt. Nate stripped the leather, he could sell it or work it into something else later, the shirt he cut with the knife. Now it was just him, and the body. The usual spike in his heartrate accompanied by his mouth watering was all he needed to jam the knife deep inside the body and start slicing away. The jerky had been fine, but now he realized he was hungry.

It wasn’t the normal type of hunger he experienced daily; this was a slow, painful hunger that gnawed at his insides. No doubt this fire was fanned by the near starving condition he’d been in for the past three days. In this moment his mind blocked out everything else. It was just him, the blood, meat, and his fresh teeth screaming to be used. 

Hancock was busy picking caps off the ground when he noticed Nate wasn’t anywhere to be seen. He hadn’t heard the other man cry out during the fight, which meant only one thing. MacCready hadn’t noticed his absence which was probably for the best. Hancock shouldered his shot gun and walked around the street; he hopped the hood of a dusty pink Corvega and found what he was looking for. “Making a mess there Love,” he said, which seemed to break Nate out of whatever trance he was in. “Shit, you look like a nightmare.” When Nate turned to look up at him his mouth was dripping blood, only this time it wasn’t his. Nate wiped his face but all that did was smear it across his cheek. 

“Sorry,” he apologized. “It’s just been so long since I’ve eaten anything. My mind got ahead of itself.” 

Hancock shook his head. “You’re just going to throw it all up again.” 

“I know,” Nate said looking back at the body. “I did get a little carried away this time.” 

“You don’t say?” Hancock dug around in his bag for some water and a cloth. “Here, clean up; don’t want Mac seeing you like that.” Nate took the cloth and water gratefully and started to wipe the blood and pieces of flesh from his face. “Hey, smile for me.” Nate did and Hancock swore again. “Guess we know why your teeth fell out last night. They’re being replaced.” 

“I know, I can feel them coming down. Hurts like all hell, already gave myself another vial of Med-X.” Nate got up and examined his reflection in the cracked side mirror of the Corvega. He didn’t look too bad; you couldn’t tell he was just eating someone at least. He gripped his jaw as his teeth shifted again. “Ughhh, this sucks.” 

“They’re uh, pointed,” Hancock remarked.

Nate lifted his lips to reveal that they were indeed pointed. “Well, if you get the cool king of the zombies look then I guess I get king of the vampires.” Hancock laughed. “I’ll catch up with you in a moment, going to loot this guy and take a few souvenirs.” 

The ghouls sauntered away to run interference on MacCready while Nate finished up. He took the sharp knife to the Raider’s arm and began slicing away strips of meat. These pieces he tossed into a separate bag that he used to carry all of his raw meat. It was hard to keep the meat from spoiling in the heat, Nate did his best by lining the bag with salts and preservatives but they’d all need a thorough cooking before they were safe to eat again. He was getting very good at quickly gutting, quartering, and skinning animals out in the field, this skill he transferred to his raider prey. Only, he usually didn’t gut and skin the humans. Since he was the only one who ate this type of meat there was no point in taking the whole body back, just the best cuts. 

Nate knocked out the raider’s teeth and tossed them into the bag as well. He had begun experimenting with making different types of oil from the bone and teeth of animals. So far he hadn’t been very successful but he was onto something, he had a feeling. The armor turned out to be crap so he left it behind, but the pockets held a meager amount of caps and some more worthless .38 ammo. Before he got up he stared at the stripped arm again. His jaw burned as another wave pain spread across his face. He made a split second decision and severed the arm at the elbow, keeping the hand and bone attached to the wrist. Then he stood up and regrouped with the others.

It was almost comical how long it took MacCready to notice that Nate was chewing on the bone. He held the hand of the raider and ate from the arm like it was a giant turkey leg. Mostly he wasn’t interested in the meat but the feeling of rubbing his new teeth against the bone. “Nate are you…is that a human arm?” 

“Mmhmm,” Nate mumbled biting down hard.

“Are you…chewing on that bone?” Nate nodded. “Why?” 

He pulled away and lifted his lip, revealing the sharp teeth that were now halfway in place. “It hurts, Mac. Like real bad.” 

MacCready stopped dead in his tracks and stared. Then he started to shakily laugh. “Oh my god, Hancock, Nate’s teething.” 

“Maaaac,” Nate whined. “This isn’t funny, it really hurts.” 

“This would be adorable if you weren’t chewing on a human arm, and if the teeth coming in weren’t nightmare fuel.” 

“Would you rather I chew on your hat?” 

MacCready put a protective hand over his hat. “No, but I’m sure we have scrap leather in a bag somewhere. You hoard enough shi-stuff to outfit an army.” 

“No,” Hancock interject, “that would imply that the stuff he picks up is useful.” 

“Wow, today must be pick on Nate day,” he grumbled and raked his teeth against the bone, scraping off chunks. 

Hancock slid an arm around him and gave him a squeeze. “We only do it because we love you.” 

“I know, I know,” Nate said. 

“So,” MacCready said walking alongside Nate. “Can you lift your lip and show me?” Nate pulled back his lip so the other could see the new teeth coming in. They were all sharp, but not thin, wider, like a normal human tooth. But unmistakably inhuman. “What do you think caused this?” 

“I have no idea,” Nate said as he returned the bone back to his mouth and clamped down. “Ughhh,” he groaned and bit down harder. 

“I’m thinking it was rads,” Hancock said. “Everyone blames rads on everything.” 

“Couldn’t be FEV…could it?” MacCready asked. 

“No way, you’d be dealing with the same thing if it was. You can’t just infect single people with that shit.” 

“If it were rads wouldn’t I also be feeling the same thing?” 

Hancock shook his head. “No. Wasteland mutations seem to affect people differently, probably genetics or something. There’s been a lot of talk about how it’s our genes that make us ghouls and not ferals.” 

Nate yanked the bone from his mouth and said, “It’s possible I ate something-“ 

“Someone,” MacCready corrected.

Nate rolled his eyes. “Someone who didn’t keep their system clean of rads. I only eat raiders and we all know they aren’t the best with personal care. Could be a chem too, I suppose. Or a mix of the two.” 

“Never heard of a chem that would do this to the human body,” Hancock commented and frowned.

“Says the man who turned himself into a ghoul using a chem,” Nate elbowed him. “The world’s full of weird shit.”

“Yeah but…” Hancock trailed off. “I still think someone should look at you when we get back to Sanctuary.” 

“I agree,” MacCready said. 

Nate nodded. “Yeah, I was going to have Curie give me a full check, run any tests she wants.” He shivered. “And I mean any test…” Sometimes Curie got a little over excitable about new things, but this time her enthusiasm might be needed. “Something’s not normal. Either I just mutated or something bad happened.” 

“Forget the teeth,” MacCready said. “I’m way more concerned about your inability to keep food down. You’ve been vomiting for three days straight after nearly every meal. You’re getting weaker; I don’t want this to get any worse.” 

That was a worry of Nate’s as well. He did notice that the jerky he ate earlier never came up; neither did the meat he consumed from the corpse. That he kept to himself, but he hoped it was a sign he was getting over whatever stomach virus he had picked up. He bit down on the arm bone as his teeth shifted down again. It was a million times worse than when he was a kid and his adult teeth came in. He could feel the actual teeth shifting in his gums and pushing the other teeth into place. It hurt so much even the vile of Med-X he took felt useless. 

A hand was kneading the muscles in his back and Nate opened an eye he didn’t even realize he closed to see Hancock standing next to him. He didn’t notice he’d stopped walking during the latest blast of pain. “Hey there Sunshine, you ok?” 

Nate nodded, but he didn’t trust himself to speak, he just clamped down harder. Of course his eyes started to water from the pain and tears dripped down his cheek. They all stood around and waited for the moment to pass. Which it did, the throbbing subsided and Nate was able to think clearly again. “Sorry,” he mumbled. 

“It’s ok,” MacCready said. He gently lifted Nate’s lip and got a good look at the new teeth. “They’re almost all the way down,” he announced. “You’ll probably be done by nightfall.”

“Thank god,” Nate said and gingerly rubbed his jaw. “It feels like a million needles are being poked into my gums.” There were only two more attacks of pain that left him kneeling on the ground trying not to scream. Then it was just mild aching pulses that came and went quickly. Those he was able to ignore and keep walking through. The sunlight was starting to fade and the group decided to head off the road and camp out for one more night. Nate knew they were close to several different settlements that were under his control, but they decided to keep their distance until Sanctuary. Whatever was wrong with Nate they didn’t want the others to know, the less panic they spread the better.

Nate helped set up the bedding with MacCready while Hancock started the fire and gathered wood. “I’m going to lie down for a few minutes, wake me when dinner’s ready,” Nate said. 

“Yeah, sure, rest up.” 

They let Nate rest for two hours; no one was really hungry so Hancock didn’t feel the need to start dinner right away. “Nate needs to hurry up and get better,” MacCready grumbled while Hancock poked around a few chunks of meat in the pan. “He’s a way better cook than you.” 

Hancock was going to argue but MacCready was right. “Yeah, he sure as shit is. Too bad the smell and sight of food tends to make him vomit at the moment.” 

“I wonder what’s wrong with him.” MacCready picked out one of the half cooked pieces of tato to eat. “Nate’s so strong it’s hard to see him sick like this. He puts on a brave face but I can tell he’s weaker.” 

“Not eating for three days will do that to a person,” Hancock said. He was worried as well, though he tried not to show just how much. “We’ll be in Sanctuary by tomorrow, and then Curie can take a look at him. She’ll have him better in no time. Or, at the very least, force him to actually lie the fuck down and rest.” 

MacCready laughed and said, “We’ll have to post a guard outside his room, make sure he doesn’t try to do work.” 

“That might kill him faster than the actual disease he picked up.” 

“You guys making fun of me again?” Nate said from the sleeping bag. 

“Just your workaholic nature Love,” Hancock replied. “You ready to try dinner?” 

He groaned and sat up. “Yeah, I think so. I’m feeling a hell of a lot better.” Nate sat down next to Hancock and grabbed a plate. “What did you make?” 

“Well, I ain’t as fancy as you are, so it was just rehydrated radstag with tatos.” 

“Sounds wonderful,” Nate replied and gave Hancock a quick kiss. 

“Hey, let’s see those teeth of yours,” MacCready said. Nate opened his mouth and pulled his lips back. MacCready tried and failed to hide his reaction. “Well…they look uh, healthy I suppose.” 

Nate took his finger away and frowned. “How noticeable are they?” 

Hancock and MacCready exchanged looks before Hancock awkwardly said, “Well Sunshine, at least we won’t be able to figure out if the strange looks are directed at me or you.” 

“They could be rotten like mine,” MacCready added.

Nate moaned and covered his face with a hand. “Great, just what I wanted, to stand out even more than I normally do.” 

“Maybe you can file them down later?” Hancock suggested. 

MacCready shrugged and said, “I don’t know maybe people won’t care? There’s ghouls and supermutants, some pointed teeth might not even register.” He was trying to be hopeful but they all knew that those teeth of his were very prominent. 

“Yeah,” Nate said with a laugh, “I’m sure no one will notice that I look like I walked out of a comic book. Totally normal.” They changed subjects and Nate focused on chewing with the new teeth. They were very, very, sharp and he caught himself nearly slicing his tongue on more than one occasion. The last thing he needed was to chop off his tongue too. Halfway through the meal Nate felt the familiar sign of his stomach churning and bile creeping up his throat. He excused himself and rushed to the outskirts of the camp where he promptly threw up what he had just eaten. 

He swore under his breath between heaves. Nate thought that after he kept down the jerky for breakfast and the raider for lunch he’d be good for dinner. It just didn’t make any sense. With a newly emptied stomach he sat down next to his companions and drained his water. At least he didn’t throw up that. Both Hancock and MacCready gave him sympathetic smiles. They’d have their answers tomorrow when Curie was able to take a look at him. 

Thankfully his stomach didn’t cause him any more problems and no new teeth needed shedding so he slept through the night without any incidents. 

They reached Sanctuary by mid-day and Nate hardly set his packs down in his room before being shoved out the door by MacCready and Hancock and across the street to the medical building where Curie and the other doctors in training worked. “Curie,” Hancock said calling her over. “We need you to take a look at Nate.” He looked around the room and added, “Somewhere private.” 

“What seems to be the problem?” Nate lifted his lip to show her his teeth. “Oh dear, that is quite unusual yes?” Everyone nodded. “Thought so.” They followed her into a backroom and she shut the door. “Tell me everything,” she demanded. After Nate explained the whole situation Curie just frowned. “This is most curious. There are several rare and dangerous diseases that can be caught from this type of diet.” She moved around the room looking for her notebook to take down notes. “I do not have the best medical testing equipment here but I will see what I can do. Let’s start by taking a few blood samples and flushing your system with Rad-Away and Addictol.” 

Nate grimaced and agreed. Addictol was a bitch, everyone knew it. The stuff kicked harder than a pissed off brahmin and left him with a headache for days. He tried to keep off the chems after his pyscho addiction in the military. That wasn’t something he ever wanted to go through again. He bit down on his sleeve Curie injected him with the clear all drug. “Fuck,” he swore and gripped the side of the table he was sitting on until his knuckles turned white.

His husbands stood by in silent support. Curie busied herself with writing down symptoms and jotting down notes on Nate’s physical condition. She asked many repeat questions and took each answer seriously. Then she pulled out several large, undamaged, medical texts and started digging through them. “You are free to leave for now,” she said. “It will take me a while to figure this out. Go rest; get some fluids and sleep, no bright lights.” 

“Right, thanks Curie,” Nate said and slipped off of the table. He wobbled on his feet and was caught by MacCready and Hancock. They were a steady support for him all the way back to his house. Before they could reach the safety of the doorway they were intercepted by Preston.

“Is Nate ok?” He asked. “I saw you rush him into the medical building.” 

Nate kept his mouth firmly shut and Hancock replied instead. “He’s just sick, Curie took a look at him, we’re waiting on some tests.” 

“He looks terrible.” 

MacCready remarked, “Feels terrible too. We’re taking him to his room for some rest.” 

“Right, I suppose I can give my report later, when he’s feeling better.” He took one last glance at Nate before turning away. “Rest up, we need you General.” 

Nate sighed and stumbled into their house and collapsed on the couch. “The bed would be better,” Hancock said. 

“The couch was closer,” Nate replied. 

“Can’t argue with that logic,” Hancock said with a smile. MacCready returned with some blankets and a pillow. “Does your head feel like its exploding?” 

Nate nodded. “Addictol, gotta love it.” 

“Yeah it’s shit, that’s why we try not to get addicted to anything. The stuff that cleans us out is worse than the addiction it feels like.” Hancock brushed Nate’s hair out of his eyes. “Never thought you’d be feeling this again did you?” 

Nate gave a shallow laugh. “Yeah, I’ve been a good boy, staying mostly clean.” 

“We’re gonna leave you be for a bit Trouble. Come find us when you’re up to it.” 

Nate waved them away and rolled over to get some sleep. He wasn’t sure how long he was out but it was near dark when he woke up. MacCready and Hancock were nowhere to be found. Thankfully the splitting headache was gone, just a dull throb remained. His legs weren’t nearly as unsteady as they were. He made his way into the kitchen and grabbed one of his bags of jerky and sat down at the table. He was paging through a comic and gnawing on a strip of meat when Curie knocked and entered the house. 

“What’s the news?” He asked. “Figure out what’s wrong with me?” 

She furrowed her eyebrows. “N-No. This is the strange thing, your symptoms they…they do not match anything I have on record. The teeth, your constant nausea, they do not add up.” She seemed distressed. “This is most unusual.” 

“Do you have any ideas?” 

“Yes, a few guesses, but that is all they are, guesses.” 

“Well let’s hear them.” 

“A combination of mutation due to radiation exposure and a bad dose of Rad-Away,” she said. “I cannot think of anything else. You are completely healthy and normal in every way.” 

“Completely healthy? That’s…that’s gotta be wrong.” 

“Oh but it is not. The tests all came back negative and normal. You are most certainly fine.” She tried a smile to make Nate feel better. “This should be good news,” she said brightly. “It means there is most likely nothing to worry about. I’ll continue to monitor you if you wish. Your new teeth are most unusual.” 

“I’d be ok with that. Anything you can suggest for my stomach? I can’t keep throwing up everything I eat.” 

Curie thought for a few moments before saying, “Yes. Try to eat simple foods, tatos, melon, some mutfruit. Stay away from complex foods like meats. Drink lots of fluids and that should help.” 

“Thanks,” Nate said. He put the jerky back in the bag and reached for a handful of tarberries in a dish on the table. “Sorry I made you do so much work for nothing.” 

“Oh no, it was no trouble at all! I love a good medical mystery, and this is quite the mystery.” 

Curie excused herself and left Nate alone in the house. He ran his tongue over his new teeth and murmured, “Completely healthy huh? Well this is some bullshit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank you for reading chapter one of Dark Craving, it's been quite the fun project to work on and I'm excited to finish up the other chapters. Shit's gonna go down.
> 
> I'd like to thank my buddy kattastic99 for his huge help with this one. He's been a constant source of ideas and Fallout lore and you can definitely blame this fic on the conversations we had while I was playing Fallout 3. 
> 
> The other fic I did with a similar idea of "perks mutate the body" can be found here:  
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/6597823  
> This one takes a look at the aquaboy perk. 
> 
> I'd love to know what you think, comments are welcome.


	2. The Calm Before the Storm

The nausea left Nate after a few days, however he wished it hadn’t because what replaced it was way worse. Hunger gnawed deep inside of him, day and night. He’d been hungry before, both in the wasteland and during his life prewar. There were times where the supply planes were shot down and their rations dwindled to zero. Sometimes growing up there wouldn’t be food on the dinner table or stock at the store, and that was life back then. They had all the cool technology they could hope for, but you can’t eat a Mr. Handy. At least when the bombs fell they had an excuse to be hungry. It was hard enough to grow plants in the irradiated soil and even harder when your crops were stolen by raiders. 

But this was different. Nate wasn’t struggling. Sanctuary was a thriving community with farms that over produced crops and he was very successful at hunting. He hadn’t been in danger of starvation in a few years, since he was fresh out of the vault and didn’t realize you couldn’t live off of irradiated, sealed, prewar cans of beans and meat. He ate three square meals a day with snacks in between and still he was hungry, always hungry. He could eat a whole steak, side of mashed tatos, and several ears of corn and still feel famished. It was getting to be more than annoying. 

For a while he tried to hide his new found appetite, but he decided it wasn’t a very good idea. The last time he hid dietary changes from his companions he ended up with a set of sharp teeth and horrible case of the stomach flu. No, this time he decided he’d come right out and say that something was up. He decided to tell them before bed, that way he didn’t have to try track either of them down. “Hey, guys? Can I ask you a question?” He started.

“Sure, sure,” Hancock said and sat down on their bed. He was taking off his boots, his coat and shirt already discarded in a pile on the floor. “Whatever is on your mind, we’ll listen.” 

“Well…” Nate rubbed the back of his head nervously. “Have either you noticed anything different about me? About my eating habits?” 

Hancock thought about it for a while. He answered carefully, “Well, you’ve been eating again, which is good. Have you been uh, sneaking corpses while we weren’t looking or something?” 

“No,” Nate answered hastily, “no, nothing like that. I haven’t carved up a human in weeks, only been eating my jerky.” 

MacCready raised an eyebrow. “Really?” He asked. “That’s uh, that’s good! I think it’d be good for you wean yourself from that particular source of meat. Like Curie said, it can’t be good for you.” 

“That’s what I’ve been thinking as well. So you two really haven’t noticed anything? Nothing?” 

Hancock and MacCready exchanged looks and shrugged. “I don’t know what to say,” Hancock said. 

Finally MacCready said, “I have noticed you’ve been taking extra portions at dinner. I just thought it was because you were getting over being sick. Is that what this is about?” 

Nate nodded and joined them on the bed. He started to unclasp the pieces of leather armor that he wore around Sanctuary. Metal armor was reserved for when they traveled between settlements. “Yeah, it is. It’s not just that I’ve been eating more; it’s that I’ve been unable to eat smaller meals. I can’t feel full, no matter what I try.”

“Do you think this has anything to do with what happened before?” MacCready asked.

Hancock placed a comforting hand on both Nate and MacCready. “Relax, I think you might be getting worked up over nothing.” He saw the questioning look in Nate’s eyes. “You just got over nearly starving yourself for a month, it’s no wonder you want to eat more. You’re probably over compensating.” 

Nate shook his head. “No, I…I don’t think that’s it. I don’t think you guys understand. I’m always hungry. All the time, every hour of every day, it feels like my stomach is eating itself and I can’t make it stop.” 

“Parasites?” MacCready guessed. “You might have a worm or two. I remember when they went through Little Lamplight, it was hel- it was bad.” 

“Oh,” Nate said. “I didn’t even think of that. That could be exactly what’s wrong. I’ll go see Curie tomorrow for some of those new de-wormers that came out.” There was an awkward pause before Nate asked, “So how uh, bad are they? Are they like the other bugs and grew ten times their size? Give me some idea of what I get to look forward to.” 

MacCready winced and said, “Well they aren’t quite that big but uh,” he swallowed, “I don’t know what they were like back then but now there’s so many…teeth.” 

Nate glanced uncomfortably at his stomach and felt the pain of hunger spread through his body again. “Great… sounds lovely.” He almost threw up just thinking about having something live inside his intestines. He didn’t deal with parasites very well, never had, they always grossed him out.

“Hey,” MacCready said sympathetically, “at least you’ll have medication to flush them out.” 

“What…God do I even want to know how you dealt with them?” Nate asked.

“We didn’t know what was causing it until one of us died and we saw one crawl up out of their mouth-” 

“Nope!” Hancock said suddenly from the edge of the bed. “I’m using my mayoral power and vetoing this conversation. We’re talking about something else. Right now.”

The other two laughed and Nate flung his shirt onto the same pile Hancock’s were. “I have a better idea,” Nate said and straddled Hancock. “How about instead of talking, we do something much better?” 

Hancock grinned, “Now that, I like the sound of.” 

\---

The next day Nate woke bright and early and untangled himself from his husbands. He showered and dressed as the sun was rising, but before he left the house he ate a basket full of mutfruit and a half a loaf of bread with jam. Then he took stock of what they had, there was still another half loaf of bread and some milk in the fridge but their supplies were definitely lower than they had been in recent memory. The freezer had a few cuts of meat, mostly radstag but there was Brahmin too, from the last one that died. But they were totally out of fresh fruit and vegetables. Luckily there were still some Sugar Bombs, enough for MacCready and some eggs Hancock could fry up, so they wouldn’t be without breakfast. 

Nate left the house and walked across the street to the clinic. It wasn’t officially open for another hour, but he knew Curie would be in, she was nearly always in. The only times she wasn’t was when she was called to another settlement or leading a research expedition. Even then, one of her assistants or fellow doctor would be there in her place. He opened the door and called for her. 

“Oh! Nate! This is quite the surprise, are you feeling alright? Is there something the matter?” 

“Nothing big, just wanted to see if you had any of those anti-parasite medications around.” 

“We just got a fresh shipment the other day,” She replied. “Do you need some?” 

“I think so, I might have picked something up out in the wasteland.” 

“Your symptoms?” 

Nate said, “Constant hunger, stomach pains, low energy, it seems like no matter how much I eat I can’t feel full. MacCready suggested that I have worms or something, which made sense to me. What do you think?” 

“Yes, parasites do seem to be a likely cause. I was afraid this might be connected to your…incident earlier but it sounds like an easy problem to fix. I’ll go grab the pills right away Sir.” She disappeared into a backroom and came back with a small bottle. “These are really strong tablets; take one a day in the morning or at night on a full stomach. You will experience gastronomic pain as they kill the parasites. It will not be a pleasant experience, Sir.” 

He took the bottle and agreed. “I’m ready for the worst.” 

“I must also warn you that there is a chance the worms might try to burrow out of the intestines to escape the poison. If you experience a prolonged sharp pain accompanied by a strange moving sensation in your bowels report to me right away. It’s imperative that we operate and remove the worm before it tears through anything a stimpak can’t fix.”

Nate stared at the bottle of tablets and wondered if curing the hunger was really worth it. He supposed that removing the worms now would be better than letting them grow any larger. He thanked Curie and left. On his way back to the house he stopped at one of the water pumps to swallow down a dose. The tablets were rather large and thankfully didn’t dissolve in his mouth. The medicine felt like home. It had been so long since he had any sort of proper medicine. Stimpaks, radaway, and med-x seemed to be the new stand ins. 

“General, good morning.” 

Nate turned to see Preston approaching. “Good morning to you too,” he replied. He still caught the way that Preston’s eyes lingered on his teeth. There had been a bit of an adjustment period for the people who knew him and his sharp teeth. Some took to them right away like Hancock and MacCready but others he could tell were still weirded out.

Preston caught sight of the medication tablets clutched in Nate’s hand and asked, “Are you sick? You should take it easy if you are.” 

“Nah,” Nate dismissed him with a wave. “They’re just anti parasitic drugs. I think I have a stomach worm, no big deal. This will probably pass in a week or so. Got anything for me?” 

Preston frowned. He didn’t like how Nate would work himself even when injured or sick. “Yes, actually. I got word that Warwick family needs some help down on their farm. If you’re feeling up to it-”

“Yeah sure, it’s quite the walk but I can head over.” 

“I know. Normally I’d send a team that’s already down there to help out but our southern teams are all caught up in other business.” 

Nate nodded thoughtfully. “It is mirelurk hatching season. They’re going to be a lot more active in the swamps and shores in that area. Should we double our numbers down there?” 

“I don’t think that’s necessary yet General. There haven’t been any new confirmed reports of new queens in the area so I think we’re good. The teams we have down there currently should be able to handle the extra mirelurks.” 

“Right. Any details on what the Warwicks want?” 

“They didn’t say, I think it’s structural damage in one of their water tanks though. The last time we were there it was looking a little rusty.” 

“I’ll stop by Diamond City and put in an order of new steel to be shipped down there for more permanent repairs. Even if it that isn’t the problem they have it’d be good to fix that up before winter and the tanks expand with ice.” 

“Who are you taking with you?” 

Nate didn’t even hesitate before saying, “Mac and Hancock.” 

“Are you sure that’ll be enough?” He knew Nate favored his husbands but he still worried that they weren’t enough. Sometimes he caught himself judging them, they were both from Goodneighbor after all, and that place never bred the best humanity had to offer. But if Nate trusted them then he would too.

“Yeah.” Nate nodded. “I can’t think of who else better to watch my back. And some hard work would do them good, they’re getting a bit lazy.” He laughed. “Besides the Warwicks can help out as well, they’re a very capable family. I’ll radio for extra help if I need it.” 

“Sounds good, any idea when you’ll be heading out?” 

“Later today,” Nate replied. He gestured at his house and said. “They’re probably not even awake yet. Hancock will sleep till the sun is directly overhead if you let him. MacCready usually comes to earlier than that. I wanted to walk around Sanctuary before they’re up. Make sure everything’s fine and I talk with a few people. You’re welcome to join me.”

“I’d like that,” Preston said. Sanctuary Hills was still in the early processes of waking up when they started their round. The morning guards had taken the places of the night watch and there was movement in the houses as smoke from morning fires filtered out of the chimneys. A few of the early risers were out in the fields busy with the morning watering session. Preston spotted Sturges out by the water purifiers, wrench in hand, ready to give the middle one a look over. 

Sometimes Preston wondered if Sturges, like Nate, ever slept. He always seemed to be doing something. The man was like a robot sometimes. “Did Curie ever figure out what was up with your teeth?” 

“No,” Nate said and slipped the medication into his back pocket. “She couldn’t figure out a concrete disease or anything. The conclusion was reached that it was just a random wasteland mutation.” 

“I see, I’m not sure that makes it any better General.”

Nate nodded. “I know. Mutations mean a shift in DNA, a shift in what makes me like you. Just like how ghouls and super mutants are a clear step beyond humans. But hopefully it was just a onetime deal. Get some weird teeth and that’s the end of it.” 

“How are your radiation levels? Have you checked that recently?” 

“I took a radaway about a month ago, I should be fine. Why are you asking?” 

Preston hesitated before replying. “Your teeth…they just, they’re like feral ghoul teeth alright? I just wanted to make sure you weren’t show any signs of going ghoul.” 

Nate rested a hand on Preston’s shoulder. “I understand your concern, but I’m currently married to a ghoul, I’m sure Hancock would notice before any of us if I was turning into a ghoul. Don’t worry; I’m taking good care of myself.” And he was too, he made a promise to cut back on eating human and he intended to keep it. No one would ever know about his dirty habit. 

“I guess that’s true. They’re just unsettling; don’t be surprised if strangers react badly to them. General, if I may?” He asked. Nate nodded. “I suggest that you look into getting them ground down. Maybe Curie could perform something like that, or a veterinarian.” 

“I’ll think about it. I’m finally able to eat again, I don’t know if I want to mess up my mouth so soon.” He laughed nervously and said, “Maybe after I gain back some of my weight, or if they become too much of a problem.” He could see the concerned look was still on his friend’s face. “I do understand that I’m the face of the Minutemen. Don’t worry, I won’t do anything to tarnish our reputation or ruin our cause.” _Like eating human flesh,_ he added silently. “I should go wake up the lazy bums I call husbands. Don’t want to leave too late. Thank you for telling me your concerns Preston. Your words mean a lot to me, you know I respect you.” 

“And I you, General.” 

Nate waved him goodbye and started back up the slight hill to his house. On his way he passed by the community gardens and noticed that the tatos were coming in strong and they’d most likely have a bumper crop and enough seed left over to expand the field. He wanted to start another farming plot behind one of the ruined houses, but the trees needed to be cleared away first. The task seemed too large to be done this year; he’d wait until the population here was stronger then move forward with expansions. He hoped to develop all of the island and spread outward into the hills to gather wood and free up farming plots. There was always the possibility of expanding housing out there as well, but the increase in security might be a drain on their resources. Perhaps when the Minutemen are stronger.

As he predicted both Hancock and MacCready were still sleeping. He almost felt bad for waking them up, almost. Nate smiled then yelled as loud as he could, “Wake up! Wake up! Deathclaws! Wake up!” 

MacCready jumped to attention, “What? Where? What?” 

Meanwhile Hancock tried to scramble out of bed but was tangled up in the sheets and just ended up falling to the ground. 

Nate leaned against the wall laughing. MacCready glared at him and was the first to wake up completely to the situation. “You ass,” he said and put down his rifle. 

“Where’s the fire?” Hancock asked trying to unwrap himself from the bedsheets. 

Nate was still laughing. “Put some clothes on, I’ll cook up breakfast.” Since they were leaving later that day Nate didn’t worry about clearing out their stock of refrigerated items. It would be better that they ate them now and not let them rot. He pulled out the eggs and started chopping their remaining vegetables. Scrambled eggs, cooked corn and carrots with imported pepper spices from the west coast would make an acceptable late breakfast. Nate placed a few mutfruit and sliced melon on the side and called it done. He heard MacCready and Hancock enter and he turned to serve them and say, “We’re heading out in a few hours. Shit, shower and shave before we go if you want.” 

“Where we heading?” Hancock asked and took the plate of food from Nate. 

“Down to the Warwick homestead. They called for some assistance and the units we have down there are busy, so I decided we’d go.” 

“Ugh,” MacCready complained. “That’s the poo place right? It’s so far away and smells. Do we have to?” 

Nate chuckled. “Yes,” he said. “I’m the General, I don’t get to choose who to help.” 

“Yeah but we can,” MacCready grumbled.

“So you want to stay home?” Nate asked. “I mean you can, I’m not forcing you to-”

“No, no, I’ll come with.” MacCready poked at his food. “Can’t let you two have all the fun.” He noticed that Nate wasn’t eating. “You not hungry?” 

Nate shook his head. “No, it’s not that,” he said. “I already had breakfast.” 

“Did you talk with Curie?” Hancock asked.

“Yup.” Nate tossed the medication on the table. He started rummaging through his various bags and packs while MacCready and Hancock ate. “We’ll be gone for probably two weeks, maybe more, at least a week of that will be travel. Normally we can get there far faster than that but it’s hatching season for mirelurks so we have to tread carefully.” 

“Great, just what I wanted to hear,” MacCready complained through a mouthful of eggs. Nate really did wish he had better table manners sometimes. “We can stay at Jamaica Planes overnight right?”

Nate shrugged. “Maybe. We’ll have to see how much ground we can cover. I already want to overnight in Diamond City.” 

Hancock groaned, “Not Diamond Shitty, do we have to?” 

“Sorry Hancock,” Nate said and patted the ghoul’s back. “I have to make a few business transactions for the Minutemen and I don’t want to try to make it to the next settlement before dark. So pack your gasmask and gloves Love.” 

“You still have that house there right?” MacCready asked. Nate nodded. “Ok, then I’m cool with it. That bed is nice.”  
Hancock grumbled. “Fine. It’s not like they ever do anything after they let me in.” 

Nate kissed the top of his head as he walked by. “Plus you can just pull your mayor card and get instant semi respect.” 

“People oughta take Goodneighbor more seriously. If we wanted to we could clean Diamond City out.” 

“Yeah but then I’d have to launch a retaliation against you because the Minutemen are allies to Diamond City and have been for decades.” 

“Sure, sure, but you’re also allies with us and married to the leader,” Hancock pointed out. “Talk about your conflicts of interest.” 

“So I either divorce you or step down as General, but it won’t come to that because you won’t launch an attack on Diamond City. No matter how terrible the people are inside.” 

Hancock nodded but then turned around in his chair. “Hey Sunshine?” He asked.

“Yeah?” 

“You wouldn’t divorce me though, right?” Nate just chuckled and walked into their room to start packing clothes for their trip. “Love you wouldn’t would you?” 

MacCready snickered and flipped through a comic book on the table. “Guess you’ll have to ransack Diamond City and find out.” 

Hancock was quiet for a moment. “You know? I don’t really want to risk that. As much as I know Nate loves me, he’s also married to the whole damn Commonwealth.” 

“That’s why I like the drifter life; I’m not aligned or tied down to anything or anyone. I’m completely free.” 

Hancock rolled his eyes, a motion that was lost now that his eyes lacked any visible difference between the iris and sclera. “You ain’t a free bird, none of us are. You got that kid back in the Capital Wastes right? That’s a pretty big chain.” 

“I uh, I guess. Though I always thought I’d just end up taking Duncan with me everywhere.” 

Nate appeared with a backpack slung over his shoulder. “Don’t you have a farmstead? Your drifter persona only works on people who don’t know you grew tatos for a living.” 

“I…” And MacCready’s face turned as red as the aforementioned tatos. “I guess I was referring more to my life before that, or uh, or after.” 

“Nah even before that you were a mayor right?” Hancock said. He stood up and elbowed Nate, “You have a thing for Mayors? Is this a secret kink?” 

Nate put his hands up in the air. “You got me,” he said, “guilty as charged.” He laughed and said, “You two should go get packed up, I want to leave soon. I want to hit Diamond City before dark so I can put in some supply orders. They need to be in before close, that way they’ll make their way onto a caravan.” 

“Right, right,” MacCready said. “On it.” He didn’t understand how supplies moved from place to place. He let Nate do all of that, he watched while Nate filled out all the forms and organized supply chains. Hancock had a better idea of what was involved, but his city wasn’t known for being extra supplied. Hancock put in orders for booze, chems, and chem supplies, those were the essentials really. And food, sometimes. Goodneighbor wasn’t a place where people went to start fresh lives, people just ended up there. The ghoul mayor just tried to keep the place relatively safe and stocked with the basics. If someone wanted the “good life” they knew to go to a minutemen run settlement. By now word had spread far of their accomplishments, many settlements had a wait list to get in.

After packing the essentials the trio headed out on the road again. “Open road and a loaded weapon, doesn’t get much better than this,” MacCready said stretching. 

“Could use a few more bars between here and there,” Hancock grumbled. 

Nate shifted his bags and reached into a pocket to grab a handful of tarberries. They reminded him so much of prewar cranberries and they were the perfect snack to keep his focus sharp. Their unique non-sweet taste was a welcome distraction from his normal hunger pains. While he chewed on them he could forget that he was starving. “There’s plenty of booze in Diamond City, you’ll live.” 

“Yeah but I can’t stab anyone there to get a free drink.” 

“You don’t stab anyone to get free drinks outside of Diamond City,” Nate pointed out. 

“Not anymore I don’t. Got your reputation on the line.” 

The other two laughed and didn’t question Hancock further. Nate sure wasn’t going to debate the statement, his first encounter with Hancock left a man stabbed and left to bleed out on the ground. He was certain that Hancock had it in him to stab someone over a drink. And he knew MacCready had bragged about killing for a drink as well. The wasteland wasn’t for the weak willed, but Nate wasn’t one who could judge, he ate people after all.

“Well I’m so glad you care about my reputation so much that you don’t commit murder over a two hundred year old bottle of beer.” 

MacCready snorted. “No way, the old stuff tastes like piss, you gotta kill for the homemade vodka or whiskey!” 

“Or, you let the liquor do the killing for you and serve the poor sap a bottle of Bobrov’s Best Moonshine.” 

There was laughter from MacCready. “Oh man, I remember the first time Vadim got me to drink that. Lucy had to carry me to our room and I didn’t remember the entire trip from the Capital Wastes to the Commonwealth. I still don’t remember that trip, come to think of it.” 

“Is it really that strong?” 

“I’ve been drinking since I was six and I’ve never had something knock me on my ass so fast.”

Hancock added, “Let’s just say that I almost got drunk off a bottle. Either that or I was having a stroke.” 

“I’ll take your words for it,” Nate said. “I’ll stick to my vodka tarberries, if I want to ruin a night there are other, less liver destroying ways. He was honestly surprised either of the men he had married still had functioning hearts, lungs and livers. Between MacCready’s drinking and Hancock’s smoking it was a miracle they were still standing. Hancock waved all concern off him by saying a ghoul was built to last, that they couldn’t die from something like alcohol poisoning. Nate wasn’t convinced that he couldn’t still rot his lungs out. He had persuaded the pair to cut back on the cigarettes, if only because Nate didn’t like the smell.

The group reached the gates of Diamond City by late afternoon. For the first time in a while the gates were dropped. They hadn’t been closed since the last time supermutants tried to breach the walls. That was well over four months ago. While Nate wasn’t officially in control of Diamond City, he did station an extra few patrols around the city. It made the Diamond City guards rest easier and gave a bit more peace of mind to the citizens inside the wall. Curiously enough, his people weren’t allowed to live inside Diamond City while stationed there, instead they had to make the short walk between Diamond City and Hangman’s Alley.

Nate had built a set a barracks in Hangman’s Alley just for the Diamond City patrols he issued. Typically patrols were made up of people who already lived in the settlement so their living accommodations were already taken care of. The extra barracks were a hassle due to that settlement’s small size. Nate ordered checks on the support beams that held up the five different levels of the settlement weekly. The last thing he wanted was to hear there was a structural failure and people died. Eventually he would get a group together to clear out the surrounding area and get fortifications up so they could claim more of the land around the alleyway. But for now they had to build up.

He passed some of his people who regarded him with an honor he sometimes felt he didn’t deserve. “Good day,” Nate said, “keep up the great work.”

“Yes Sir!” 

“Hey,” Nate stopped one to ask, “do you know what’s going on in town? They have the gate dropped.” 

“Oh, they’ve started vetting people who are allowed in,” the minuteman said. “Something about keeping undesirables out I think.” 

Hancock growled beside Nate. “By undesirable do they mean people from Goodneighbor or-”

“Relax, I’ll find out,” Nate said. “Thanks,” he said to the minuteman, “I hope your patrol is without excitement.” 

“Thank you Sir.” 

“Undesirables huh? Sounds like prewar talk to me. That was a big deal back then, keep out people you don’t personally like and label them troublemakers.” 

“That’s what they did to the ghouls,” Hancock said. “What are they going do? Check your arm for needle marks?” Nate could tell he was thoroughly disgusted. “And how the hell are we going to sneak me inside now? If they’re checking people they’ll want to know who’s under the mask,” he said as he slipped it on over his head. “This is bullshit.” 

“Racism is alive and well even after the world ends,” Nate said dryly. 

MacCready who had been silent up until now said, “I think it’s unfair how ghouls get treated, even here in the Commonwealth where things are better it’s still shi- er crap.” They walked up to the gate and stood in the line that had formed. “Like with Hancock here, he was human recently, just ten years ago, there’s literally no difference between the man he was and the one standing beside us, save for the skin and lack of hair.” 

“And the change in character,” Hancock said. “Come on, I grew a bunch since my wild days.” 

“Your “wild days”?” Nate asked with a laugh. “Those have never stopped.” 

“My point stands though,” MacCready said. “I think it’s easier to rag on the prewar ghouls because nobody ever knew them. They just popped into people’s lives looking like fantasy zombies. It’s easier to discriminate against them verses if someone you knew went ghoul.”

Hancock snorted, “Oh no they’ll still kick your ass to the curb if they find out. Doesn’t matter if you’re family.” Even though his voice was muffled by the mask Nate and MacCready could still hear the hurt.

“Were you… does your brother know?” Nate asked.

“Yeah, he knows. Listen I don’t really want to talk about it, especially not while we’re just standing around.” 

Nate nodded and apologized, “Sorry, I didn’t know. It never came up.”

“Don’t worry about it Sunshine,” Hancock said. “It’s not a time of my life that I’m proud of nor am I fond of many of the memories. I should have brought it up earlier, not fair that I know everything about you yet there’s still parts of me I haven’t let you see.” 

They moved up in line and Nate began to seriously wonder if this was a safe or efficient way to screen people. You couldn’t tell a lot about a person just based on looks. If a raider decided to wear normal armor or a shirt, they’d be impossible to tell from a normal mercenary or drifter. He was beginning to think this was a fruitless time wasting exercise. When the soldiers at the gate finally got to them one said, “State your name and business in Diamond City.” 

“My name’s Nate, General of the Commonwealth Minutemen and I’m here to arrange some trade shipments between settlements and visit my home.” 

The man looked up from his clipboard. “Oh, I’m so sorry General; you didn’t have to stand in line. You should have said something.” 

“I didn’t mind, I can wait like everyone else. What’s up with this by the way?” He asked. “I get that it’s important to keep raiders out, but I don’t think this is the way. Leaves a lot of folks exposed, sitting ducks if you ask me.” 

The guard just shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you General, the mayor just decided that it would help with security. Make the people feel safe.” Hancock snorted and Nate shot him a look. “Anyways, you’re good to go. We know you aren’t a troublemaker.”

Nate stepped forward but paused when the other guard said, “Hey, you’re good but your friends ain’t.” 

The first guard rolled his eyes and said, “Any friend of Nate’s is a friend of Diamond City.” 

“Hold up, this one’s got a goddamn Gunner tattoo on his head. You know the rules on Gunners.” 

MacCready’s hand reflexively went to the spot above his right eye. “I uh, I quite the Gunners, a long time ago.” 

The guard eyed MacCready with distrust. “Just let them through,” his partner said. “We don’t have time to waste arguing. If they’re with Nate they’re good, doesn’t matter their past.” 

“What’s the point of doing this if we’re just going to let the people on the list pass right on through? It says right here, clear as day, admit no one bearing a Gunner tattoo, raider emblem, anyone who is a supermutant, ghoul, or synth, besides Nick, or anyone who looks like a chem addict.” 

“I think I’ll be having a little chat about this with your mayor,” Nate said. “A lot of this sounds like profiling, you can’t tell a chem addict by looking, and it’s not fair to deny them entry when you have a whole shop inside your walls devoted to selling unregulated chems. MacCready is with me, he’s not a Gunner and I own property inside Diamond City. If the mayor has issues with it he can come find me.” 

Nate started walking and didn’t stop, his husbands followed suit and nobody stopped them. The gate was raised and they walked right inside. “God that was annoying. I hope they get rid of that policy fast or no one will bother doing trade with Diamond City.” 

“Wouldn’t that work best for you?” Hancock asked. “You could just open up another trade hub, like at Sanctuary or something.” 

“Sanctuary is far too far north to be good. It’d have to be a more central location, like the Fin Farm or maybe Jamaica Plain. But the minutemen are in no shape to be building and guarding a trading center to rival Diamond City, not now. We need more members and resources for that. If anything, I’d like to take a new location for something like that. Preferably one of those old abandoned malls. But that’s an issue for another day.” 

“Hey,” MacCready said from behind them. “I’m sorry about causing trouble.” 

“Don’t be,” Nate said. 

“Yeah,” Hancock took off the mask as soon as they got past the Publick Occurrences. “We all got shit in our past we regret.” 

MacCready rubbed the AB+ again and sighed. “Yeah I know, but… if I wasn’t with you I wouldn’t have been let in, that’s… kinda a big deal. It’s something I didn’t realize when I was letting them brand me.” 

“Hey, I wouldn’t be let in either, doesn’t make you a bad person, you had no way of knowing what was going to happen. Don’t sweat it. We got in, it’s no big deal.” 

Nate cut through the busy business center of the city to the door to his house. He slipped the key in and pushed the door open. The lights took a few moments to blink on. Nate entered and stretched. “Ah, my home away from home,” he said and dropped his bags on the couch. He liked to boast that he had the best house in Diamond City. All it was missing was a window, but he made it work. “Anything in the fridge? I’m starving.” 

“You’re always starving Love,” Hancock said placed his gear next to Nate’s. Then he walked over to the fridge and looked inside. “Nah, nothing but Nuka Cola in here.” 

“Toss me one of those then,” he said. 

“We can go out for dinner tonight,” MacCready said. “Have some noodles after you’re done with your boring minutemen business.” 

“That sounds like a plan,” Nate said and drained the bottle of cola. It didn’t do much to drive away the hunger. He hoped that the anti-parasite pills would kick in soon. “You two don’t have to follow me around the market if you don’t want to. It’s just going to be paperwork and caps exchanging hands.” 

“Fantastic,” Hancock, “then we won’t.” 

“What are we going to do then Hancock?” 

Hancock wiggled what was left of his eyebrows. “I think we can figure that out.” 

Nate grabbed one of his smaller packs. “You two have fun, bed’s upstairs, rad-x in the medical case near the bed. Soil the sheets and I’ll be pissed.” 

“Aw is that a hint of jealousy in your voice?” 

“Why should I be jealous? You two are mine after all.” With that he left the house and stepped back into the busy market square. He headed over to Diamond City Surplus to talk with Myrna. Out of everyone in Diamond City, and perhaps the whole Commonwealth, he liked Myrna the least. “Hey Myrna,” he said and tried to stay upbeat. “How’s business?” 

“Hey, hey, hey, back up! Back away from my stall!” 

Nate rolled his eyes and put his hands up and backed away. “Myrna how many times are we going to do this little dance before you believe that I’m not a synth?” 

She frowned and said, “Open your mouth.” Nate sighed but did as she asked. “I see the Institute has gotten lazy with their details, nice try synth.” 

Nate groaned and put his hands down. “I’m not a synth you’re just paranoid. The teeth are due to a uh, mutation that happened a few weeks back. Nothing serious, nothing sinister.” 

“Right, sure, just a mutation, that’s exactly what a synth would say!” 

“Listen, do you want two thousand caps or not? Because I can just take my business to Bunker Hill.” 

She looked at Nate, then down at the bag he carried by his side before saying, “Fine, we’ll do business. But don’t come to close! I’m watching you.” 

“Ok, ok.” He stepped forward and pulled out a clipboard from his pack and asked, “Do you have any shipments of steel in stock?” 

“No, next one’s not due for another day or so.” 

“That’s fine; I need three of your biggest shipments sent down to one of my settlements on the south side. Along with two crates of ceramic and at least five pallets of wood.” 

“Building something?” 

“No it’s just for show,” Nate said and then realized his joke probably didn’t translate to her. “Yeah, we’re re-enforcing the water tanks down at a farm and installing some more turrets.” 

“Need any copper?” 

“Nah, I go through Arturo for that. His copper is of a higher quality since he uses it for weapon mods and such, no offense to you or your shop.” He crossed some things off of a list and reached down into his bag for another smaller leather pouch. This was where he stored his caps. “Do you have a price approximation for all that?” 

“Twenty-one hundred caps, your estimate was nearly on the mark,” she narrowed her eyes, “almost too close.” 

“I’ve made almost this exact transaction before, it’s not like I can’t do math without being a synth.” Nate pulled out several bound packs of caps. He kept them tied off in stacks of one hundred, it made these larger purchases go much faster. He counted out twenty one of them and placed them on the table. “Those are each individually counted to be one hundred each, if it turns out one is miscounted you can send a bill to Sanctuary Hills detailing the amount I owe.” 

“Will you be using one of my caravans to deliver your goods or your own? Mine come with an added fee for the hired guns and Brahmin feed.” 

Nate shook his head. “No I’ll be using one of mine.” He reached for the shipment agreement and signed his name at the bottom. Under that he added contact information for his caravan team over in Hangman’s Alley. “When the shipments all come in radio over to Hangman’s Alley, their frequency is listed here. Tell them the shipment for Warwick Homestead is in. They’ll come over and pick it up.” Myrna took the caps and the signed paper back and wrote Nate a receipt. “Pleasure doing business with you.” 

“Wish I could say the same, synth General.” 

He laughed uncomfortably and walked over to Arturo’s shop. “Hey! Arturo, got any new guns in?” 

“Nate! Ah, it’s been a while. Nothing of your caliber has come in, but could I interest you in a nice shot enhancer for your plasma rifle?” 

Nate thought about it for a second. “What’s the damage capacity boost?” 

“What do you have on it now?” 

“Right now? A medium focus beam, you sold it to me a couple months ago.” 

“Oh yeah, I remember that one, snagged it from a crashed military plane. This one’s rumored to have been Enclave tech, it should condense the shot twofold and reduce the amount of energy per shot so your canisters last longer. Interested?” 

“Yeah, that sounds great. Let me know when you get another glow sight in, the one on my radium rifle is going out. I’d like to buy from you instead of Cricket, she uh, worries me sometimes.”  
Arturo laughed and dug out the box containing the modification parts. “Do you need me to install it overnight or?” 

“I’m good, if I can’t figure it out MacCready can.” 

“You still traveling with that kid?” 

Nate chuckled. “I better be, I married him.” 

“Oh that’s right! You and the ghoul of yours added him in. Good kid, great with guns. He out talked me first we met. Was there anything else I can do for you?” 

“Yeah actually I need a few feet of copper wiring; I’ll take raw copper shipments if you don’t have any on hand. I’ll need at least two boxes of raw.” 

“I’ll see what I have in stock,” he said and left Nate to head inside. Arturo kept the more expensive goods in back where they weren’t as likely to be victims of a quick robbery. “You’re in luck,” he said coming back out with a box in hand and some wire over his shoulder. “I have a few feet of wire in coils and a box of raw. What do you need?” 

“I’ll take that box off your hands and half of the wire coil. That’ll be what, three thousand caps? I think copper had a price spike a month ago.” 

“Yeah three thousand sounds about right, but for you I’ll mark it down to twenty five hundred. How’s that sound?” 

“It sounds like you’re still my favorite weapons dealer, just don’t tell KL-E-0,” Nate joked. 

“Ah, she’s that assaultron up in Goodneighbor right? Damn scary woman, your secrets safe with me.” 

“Thanks,” Nate smiled and then turned away when Arturo flinched. “Right, uh, here’s your caps. I’m sure MacCready will be around later to clean out your ammo supply.”

Arturo handed over the copper and the box with the mod in it. “See you around Nate,” he said with a wave.

As he turned around to head home his eyes caught sight of someone he hadn’t seen in a while. “Now Takahashi I already told you, I’m a detective not a repairman. You’ll have to get someone else to look at your vocal processor.” Nick looked over and spotted Nate. “Someone like Nate.” 

“Oh no, Nick why do you get his hopes up?” 

“Nani shimasu ka?”

“Sorry bud, I already told you that I can’t attempt to fix you until I know more about Protectrons. I don’t want to make things worse.” 

“Nani shimasu ka?” Takahashi looked down at the pot he was stirring. Even with one phrase he was capable of saying he still sounded so defeated.

“Don’t give up hope Takahashi, someday you’ll get fixed. I don’t care what the Mayor says; he won’t be in power forever.” Nick rested a hand on Takahashi’s shoulder. It was a moment of brief comradery between two robots in a fleshy world. “So,” Nick said turning his attention to Nate. “What brings you to town? I haven’t made any progress on your case, if that’s what you’re wondering.” 

“Nah I’m not here for that,” Nate said. He lifted the box up and said, “I’m doing a supply run for a settlement, ordering shipments, that kind of thing. And honestly,” he stepped closer to Nick. “You can just drop the investigation into Shaun.” 

“What? No. You can’t be serious.” 

Nate shrugged helplessly. “It’s been over a year. He was just a baby when he was taken, if we haven’t found him by now… realistically what chances do we have?” 

Nick looked down. He hated admitting that a case was hopeless, especially one so important. “You always had such drive. I really thought…” his eyes flicked up then back down. “Shit Nate, you sure?” 

“If Shaun isn’t dead then he’s been squirreled away by the Institute or sold so deep into slavery that I’ll never see him again. It’s better to just… put your resources into a case that really matters. I’ll still keep an eye out and listen for any clues, but I think we’ve run this case to the end of the road.” Nate reached into his pocket for his caps stash. “How much do I owe you for your time?” 

“Nate, Nate, no you don’t owe me anything. Friends help friends and you’ve saved my butt more times than I can count. Tell you what, I’ll keep your case open, but put it to the side.”

“Ok,” Nate agreed. “I just want to pour my time and effort into making the Commonwealth a better place, instead of chasing ghosts around.” 

“Chasing ghosts…” Nick trailed off.

“You ok?” 

“Yeah, just thinking. Thinking about things.” He changed his train of thought and the conversation. “So, those teeth of yours are new I take it?” 

“Oh yeah, we haven’t spoken in a while. The good old wasteland decided I needed a mutation.” 

Nick narrowed his eyes. “I’ve heard rumors before about people with teeth like that.” 

“Oh yeah?” Nate asked, he shifted his backpack uneasily. “What do those rumors say?” 

“That people with sharp teeth tend to be cannibals. I want you to be honest with me, have you been eating people?” 

“Nah,” Nate said as smoothly as he could. “That rumor I guess is just a rumor. Interesting thought though, I can see how that could be possible, these teeth of mine definitely look like they belong on a monster.”

Nick let his shoulder drop a bit. “Yeah, they strike a sort of instinctual fear into you, and I’m not even made of flesh anymore. How long will you be in Diamond City? Did you bring your regular group of trouble?” 

“Only for one night, leaving in the morning and I-”

“Nicky! Hey it’s been a while!” 

They both turned to see Hancock sauntering over. People accused Nate of looking like a hunter with his new teeth but that wasn’t fair. The way Hancock moved oozed predator and he wasn’t even trying. “Yes,”  
Nate finished saying, “I did bring Mac and Hancock.” 

Hancock slung an arm around Nick and pulled him down. “How’s my favorite mechanical man? Nothing’s fallen off yet, that’s good to see.” 

“I could say the same to you.” Nick put up with Hancock’s personal space invading tendencies. He practically watched the man grow up from a boy. Never would he think himself a father figure to Hancock, he had his own father and didn’t need a stand in, but he did think of himself as family, even if it was distantly related. “Still just missing the one toe?” 

“Just the one!” 

“Oh hey Valentine, it’s uh, nice to see you.” 

However, Nick did not view MacCready in the same light. He couldn’t shake a feeling of distrust when he was around the young man. Something about him unnerved him, he was a good kid, he was sure of that or else Nate wouldn’t care so deeply about him, but he couldn’t place what it was that bothered him. Maybe it was his eyes, he had the same look every killer for hire had. But he was always pleasant and friendly, no need to be hostile when the kid didn’t deserve it. “Hey there MacCready, you staying out of trouble?” 

“Impossible with these two,” he said. “They’d both wander into a den of deathclaws if I wasn’t watching out for them. Or pick a fight with the entire Brotherhood of Steel.” 

“Hey I still might do that last one, haven’t’ decided yet,” Nate said. 

“At least wait until the Institute is taken care of, better to have just one enemy than two,” Nick said. “You’re a great leader but everyone has their limits.” 

Hancock elbowed him. “Nah Nate here’s a one man army. Give that man a super stimpak and a bag of ammo and he could go for hours. Anyways, Sunshine how would you feel about grabbing dinner early?”

“I wouldn’t complain,” Nate replied. “Why?” 

“Well MacCready and I were thinking that after noodles we could hit the Dugout Inn for a few drinks.” Nate raised an eyebrow. “Hey! I was promised alcohol on the road, and this very well might be the last time I can get any for a week or so.” 

“True. I’m up for it if you two are.” 

“Oh I’m always up for a beer or five,” MacCready said and sat down at one of the empty barstools. “Hey Takashi can I get one of those “shimasha whatevers?” 

“Nani shimasu ka?” The robot said with just the slightest hint of a sigh.

“Yeah! One of those. Extra jalapenos.” 

“Nani shimasu ka?” 

“You’re the best Takahashi.” 

Nate gave the robot an apologetic look. “Make it two more orders, one for me and one for Hancock,” Nate said and sat down next to MacCready. “Extra broth in Hancock’s, double the meat in mine.” 

“Nani shimasu ka?” Takashi said and set another pot on the stove and began rolling noodles out. It was always cool to see the noodle bowls being made fresh, someday when his voice box was fixed Nate would love a lesson in making noodles.

“Nick you’re welcome to join us, unless you have something else that needs your attention.” 

“I suppose I can spare a few moments of my time for some friends,” Nick said and sat down. They had now officially taken up all the available spaces around the Power Noodles booth. Takahashi turned to Nick to take his order. “Ah, no thanks friend. I’m on a diet.” 

“Wait, what?” MacCready leaned forward to look at Nick with wide eyes. “Are you really?” 

Nick just winked and the others all laughed. MacCready turned red and looked down at his hands. They passed a few hours away bullshitting and eating. It really had been a while since they all had time to relax and reconnect. There were many road stories to swap and Nick had had a few flavorful cases. A guard passed by who did a double take at Hancock. “Oh hell, they let you in again Hancock?”

Hancock just leaned back and grinned. “Every time. Your security is garbage you guys.” 

“One of these days you’ll run into a guard that gives a shit.” 

“But until then,” his grin grew wider, “it’s my lucky night right?” 

The guard laughed. “Yeah, we’ll all continue to look the other way. Just don’t start nothin alright?” 

“Mayor’s promise,” Hancock added, “that’s legally binding you know.” He turned his attention back to his friends. He always got away with being inside Diamond City. It was probably because he was with Nate, but sometimes he liked to imagine the guards all still recognized him. He wasn’t real close to the guards or anything, but they always let him sneak in and out in the middle of the night to go on his chem runs. In a way he owed them for the way his life turned out. Hancock looked across the table at Nate who was sitting stock still. A mountain of empty noodle bowls sat next to him. “Hey, Sunshine?” He tried to get Nate’s attention. “You uh, you ok? Eat too much or something?” 

Nate didn’t respond until MacCready gave him a shake. He snapped to attention. “Huh? What?” 

“Are you ok?” MacCready echoed the ghouls concern. “Are you going to be sick or something?” 

“I… no. I’m fine,” he gave a weak smile and drained the rest of the broth in his bowl. He added the bowl he just finished to the pile. There were so many and yet, his hands grasped at his stomach which was churning uncomfortably, he was still hungry. It felt like he was starving but he wasn’t, the hunger was gnawing at him from the inside out. But that wasn’t the worst part. There was something else that he couldn’t shake.

MacCready smelled good. This was puzzling for two reasons; the first was that MacCready wasn’t known for his hygiene, it was rare that he smelled acceptable none the less good. The second was that he didn’t smell just good, he smelled appetizing. His mouth watered when he breathed it in and he had to swallow thick saliva that wouldn’t stop. The more he tried to ignore it the stronger it got. He had tuned his friends’ conversation out and just tried to focus on anything other than MacCready’s enticing scent. But that just made everything worse because now everyone was starting to smell delicious.

He looked from person to person who passed and his heart started to hammer in his chest. The flurry of activity stirred up a hundred scents and they were all screaming “eat me.” Nate shook his head violently and clenched his eyes shut. “I…” He said, voice trembling. “I gotta go.” 

“What? Sunshine do you need help?” Hancock’s words sounded muddled like they were coming to him through water. “I can help you to the house if you-”

“No. I just… maybe you’re right and I ate too much.” He had enough forethought to reach into his bag and throw his caps pouch on the table. “Cover the tab I’m going to lie down.” He stood up from the table and hastily made his retreat. He swore he was losing his mind because he could see the smells swirl around him like in some cartoon. 

Someone bumped into him and he roughly pushed them aside. “Sorry,” he barked. The reaction might have seemed over the top to the other person but they had no idea how close they were to having Nate burry his fangs into their neck and chew. He fumbled with his keys before the door finally opened and he slammed it behind him and leaned against it. “Holy shit,” he said as the world swayed a bit under his feet. He pushed off from the door and stumbled to his pack. He knew exactly what he needed. His fingers trembled as he opened the bag of human jerky. 

Nate swallowed the first few pieces whole before he took the time to chew. Relief was nearly instant. The room stopped spinning and his heart slowed in his chest. “What the fuck?” Nate muttered. He kept shoving jerky into his mouth as he climbed the stairs to his bed. Desperately he wanted to blame this all on a side effect of the pills he had taken but he knew it wasn’t. What kind of medication would make him view humans like prey? Something wasn’t right and the jerky in his hand was beginning to look like it held all the answers. 

He flopped down onto the bed but instantly regretted it. The strong scent of MacCready hit his nose at full force and he nearly attacked the pillow. Nate rolled off the bed and onto the floor where he scooted against the wall and placed a strip of meat between his teeth that he could bite down on. He drew his legs up to his chest and pressed his face into them. The sharp hunger pangs were dissipating and so was the desire to hunt. He wasn’t certain but it seemed like the jerky was holding back the desire. 

Eventually he pulled himself up and gently sat down on the bed. He reached for a blanket that smelled more like Hancock, for some reason the scent of a ghoul didn’t trigger the same reaction that a human’s did. Nate never brought up his enhanced sense of smell to his husbands. He first noticed it the morning his new teeth came in. He figured it was part of the same mutation that caused the teeth and it wasn’t too bothersome so he never mentioned it. 

It didn’t really affect him all that much day to day, he just had to get used to the fact that he could smell different people. At first he kind of liked it; it was really nice to be able to tell that someone he loved had just been here, or that there were raiders hidden up ahead. But if the mere whiff of MacCready would make him want to consume human flesh then he wasn’t so sure the enhanced sense could stay. Perhaps he could pick up some other bad habit to cancel it out? MacCready and Hancock both smoked, he could try that, smoking was supposed to deaden the sense of smell and taste… But he didn’t know if he could bring himself to do that.

He opened a bedside table drawer and pulled out a book he was reading and got a bit cozier. The pouch of meat he set on the table surface and he covered his legs with a blanket. The door downstairs opened and moments later Hancock could be seen ascending the ladder to the upper floor. “Hey you doing ok?” He asked.

“Yeah,” Nate replied. “I think I just overate, stomach hurts a bit nothing big,” he lied. He had been lying a lot recently even though he promised himself he wouldn’t. 

“MacCready and I are going to hit the Dugout Inn, I don’t suppose you’ll be joining us?” 

Nate shook his head. “I’m going to let my stomach settle and maybe put together that mod I bought for my- Oh shit the mod! And the copper! I left it by the-”

“Don’t worry, MacCready grabbed them, they’re on the main table downstairs.” 

He breathed a sigh of relief, for a moment he thought he just wasted nearly three thousand caps. While money wasn’t tight, he hated the thought of wasting minutemen funds. “Thanks, you guys are lifesavers. Have fun at the bar, but don’t party too hard, we’re getting up bright and early tomorrow to make the trek down to the Warwick’s.” 

“We’ll be good,” Hancock smirked, “well, as good as we can be.” 

Nate blew him a kiss and Hancock climbed back down the ladder. He heard the door shut and then went back to his book. He wanted to go with them, it had been a long time since he had seen the regulars at the Dugout but he didn’t trust himself. He couldn’t afford to snap at anyone, one aggressive flash of teeth could spell his doom. 

While he might not be forced to step down as general, word would spread throughout the settlements. Right now, things were still too unstable to risk losing his core leadership. While he trusted Preston and some of the older Minutemen to keep everything they had running, he did doubt the general public's reception of them to stay positive if their leader was found to be a cannibal. It wouldn’t do any good to keep the Minutemen running if no one trusted them anymore. And Nate couldn’t let that happen. So he stayed put, read from his book and eventually wandered down to try to assemble the mod he bought.

Nate noticed that as the hours passed the stabbing hunger would return like normal, but if he nibbled on some jerky it would vanish. His stomach churned as a reminder that he wasn’t actually hungry, he’d consumed way more than enough at the noodle stand to last him into tomorrow. But his brain kept telling him he was hungry. To say it was annoying was an understatement. He ignored the cravings and tried to focus on his gun but the same sensation he felt back at the Power Noodle booth washed over him. All his senses seemed to hyper focus and his mouth filled with unwanted saliva. Nate pressed his head into the table and tried to take deep, calming breaths. All that accomplished was filling his nose with the scent of MacCready that lingered all around and a few of the other humans he could smell through the door.

He swore and tried to just work on his gun, but now his hands had started shaking so badly he couldn’t even hold a screwdriver. He tried flexing his fingers and focusing on one thing in the room, but his vision kept blurring and focusing beyond his control. This was far worse than any hit of Psycho he had ever had. Nate was acutely aware of every beat of his heart, he could hear his pulse in his ears and taste blood on his tongue. Finally, when he felt like he couldn’t take it any longer, he reached for his bag of jerky and greedily swallowed a few bites. 

Like before, relief was near instant, but the nagging, clawing, feeling of hunger never went fully away. Nate was praying that this feeling wouldn’t become permanent. He figured he could always gnaw jerky but what if that didn’t work? He didn’t want to think about it. Luckily, he didn’t have to as he heard two familiar voices from outside. 

“Holy hell you’re wasted.” 

“It _just_ hit me Hancock.” 

“It did not just hit you. Here lean against the wall, I have to unlock the door.” 

Nate had to suppress an amused chuckle. He glanced at the time on his Pip-Boy, they had been gone for several hours. He knew it was near impossible to get Hancock truly drunk or high, both activities involved copious amounts of each vice, but MacCready? MacCready was not a ghoul and thus could get drunk like anyone else. He could hear MacCready hiccupping loudly from outside. “Sounds like you two had fun,” Nate commented as they walked in.

“You know it,” Hancock replied and walked over, draping an arm around Nate. “You feeling better?” 

“Much, anything happen at the Dugout?” 

“Made fifty caps off of bar bets,” Hancock replied and set a bag down on the table. “It’s been what, ten years now since they chased all the ghouls out of the city? Means a lot of kids don’t know they can’t outdrink a ghoul. I’ll do shots ‘till the Brahmin come home if they’re paying, bonus if there’s extra caps on the line.” 

“No one died, right?” Nate had to ask. 

“Vadim wouldn’t let that happen. Now, if they all managed to stumble home is another story.” Hancock shrugged off his coat and tossed it on one of the couches. “A lot of people were wondering where you were, they miss hearing your stories.” 

“Next time I promise,” Nate said.

“You better,” Hancock said with a bit of a laugh, “or you’ll make a liar out of me, I promised the same thing.” 

MacCready wandered over and glanced at the gun on the table. “You’re gonna want to *hic* want to flip that mirror around or you’ll have to take it all apart.” 

Nate looked up at him and asked, “You sure? I was pretty certain that’s what the directions said.” 

“I’m drunk not *hic* stupid. The booster isn’t straight either. Fire it *hic* fire it crooked and you’ll lose an arm.” 

Nate took another, closer, look at the gun and sure enough the booster wasn’t straight on with charge capacitor. He didn’t realize how shoddy his work had become after his hunger got bad. “Oh wow, you’re right, thanks. I must be getting tired or something.” 

Hancock agreed. “We should turn in for the night. There’s a long road of walking ahead of us.” 

Nate moved to follow the two up the ladder to the bed but hesitated. “You know, I think I’m going to sleep on the couch. Closer to the bathroom.” 

“You said you were feeling better Love, something you ain’t telling us?” 

“No, no.” Nate said quickly, perhaps too quickly. “I just ate a ton of food right? Those noodles are going to come out one way or another.” 

“Gross!” MacCready said from the ladder. 

“Ok,” Hancock said and gave him a quick kiss. “Make sure you take those meds Curie gave you.” 

“I got it, don’t worry Hancock. I’m only supposed to have one day, so I’m not due till the morning.” He kissed Hancock back and went to go set up the couch. “Toss me a pillow from up there,” Nate said and was returned with a pillow to the face. “Thanks,” he mumbled but he could hear MacCready laughing. He grabbed a spare blanket from a chair and went to lie down for night. 

The lights went off upstairs and Nate could hear Hancock swear and say, “For fucks sake MacCready hold your breath or something.” And then more laughing. “You’ve been at it for two hours.” Still more laughing. Sometimes Nate swore he married two children. 

Nate closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep, but the nagging hunger and desire to eat human flesh kept him wide awake, well into the early morning. 

\---

“Am I the only one who feels completely rejuvenated by our little Diamond City pit-stop?” 

MacCready groaned, “Ugh shut up Hancock. Nate has worms and I’m hungover as all heck.” 

“I told you not to go overboard with the drinking,” Nate said. He was tired but it wasn’t from the medication. At least he didn’t wake up with the urge to kill his companions and eat them. It must have been a freak thing. “You have no one to blame but yourself.” 

“Ok, but you’re most of my impulse control. Hancock just eggs me on.” 

“You’re both terrible and I love you.” Despite everyone but Hancock being less than one hundred percent, they were making good time. The road out Diamond City was clear with little to no other traffic. They passed two caravans who were on their way into Diamond City. These roads were heavily used and maintained a great deal more than the others. While it was a great for traveling because of it’s ease it also meant that it was perfect for ambushes. Many foolish caravans had been lost due to being unprepared or letting their guard down for a moment. 

“Think we’ll have to spend another night in Jamaica Plain?” Hancock asked. 

“I don’t know,” Nate replied. He checked his Pip-Boy. “We’re nearly halfway to Jamaica Plain, if we keep this pace we’ll hit it by late afternoon. From there it’s a fairly long walk to the Warwick’s, plus we have to pass through Quincy.” 

MacCready shuddered. 

“Isn’t Quincy still held by the Gunners?” 

“Yeah, for the moment at least. We have enough issues stabilizing the settlements in the north that admittingly we’ve done a poor job with our southern locations.” Nate reached for his bag of tarberries. “There’s a lot of land and not many of us. It’s why the roads past Jamaica Plain and Egret Tours are so bad. We just can’t keep up with the super mutants and mirelurks. Not to mention the raiders and gunners that seem fond of setting up shop in the south.” 

“It’s a uh, a big company that controls Quincy,” MacCready said quietly. “We best avoid it, go around. Way around.” 

“I’ve made trips down to Warwick and the Atom Cats before, it shouldn’t be too big of a deal.” 

“No,” MacCready insisted. “I really think we should avoid that area. Please.” There was something about the way MacCready was acting that seemed off to Nate. Sure the younger man didn’t exactly crave danger, but he was never this adamantly opposed to going near an area before. Especially one that Nate knew the borders of. Then it hit him like a slug to the gut. 

“Alright,” Hancock said, “no problem, it’s not a big deal to go around. There’s a residential nearby that I send my guys through.” They both kept walking and they had gone a bit up the road before they noticed that Nate wasn’t following. “Love you alright?” Hancock and MacCready jogged back over.

“You’re pale, you look like you’ve seen a deathclaw,” MacCready remarked. 

“Mac,” Nate said. “I’m going to need you to be real honest with me.” 

“O…kay?” Now it was MacCready’s turn to go a bit pale. “W-Whatever you need.” 

“Were you at the Quincy Massacre? As a Gunner?” 

MacCready immediately broke eye contact. His hand went up to the brand above his eye. “I…” he shrugged helplessly. “I…I made a lot of mistakes in my life,” he said finally. 

“Robert Joseph MacCready were you a Gunner at the Quincy Massacre?” 

“Yes.” MacCready looked up at Nate’s face and saw a man made of disappointment. “I, Nate you have to believe me when I say I didn’t take a single shot.” He took one small step forward and said, “Please.”

“Why didn’t you say anything earlier?” 

“What was I supposed to say?” MacCready looked from Nate to Hancock. “Hey I was with the band of assholes that gunned down a whole town? Yeah I heard children screaming, I probably knew the guy who shot the Long’s kid. How about you hire me Mr. General of the Minutemen? How about you fall in love with me? How about you think of me as anything other than the dirt I am?”

MacCready’s eyes burned. “I didn’t tell you because I’m ashamed that I was even there. You know how hard it was to walk into Sanctuary and see the same faces I saw through my scope? To recognize them only to have them not know who I was? You think that was easy?” 

Hancock placed a hand on MacCready’s shoulder. “You left, that’s what matters.” 

MacCready looked again at Nate, searching his face for the forgiveness he craved. “Nate please. I didn’t shoot, I… I left as soon as I could. I got demoted for my refusal to participate, sent north to the group that Barnes and Winlock ran. Then I left at my first opportunity.” 

“You watched a town get slaughtered. You didn’t lift a finger.” 

MacCready flinched. Hancock steadied his hand. “Enough,” he said roughly. “What was he supposed to do? Take them all on alone? Jump sides? Because the good people of Quincy would be able to tell him apart from the rest.” Hancock narrowed his eyes. “He had a kid to provide for, same as you. You can’t judge him for mistakes he clearly regrets.” 

“Oh I can judge him,” Nate said. He pulled a leather cord around his neck and brought up the small wooden soldier that hung from it. “How did you like being a soldier? Was it everything you hoped? Was it as noble as the lie you spun your wife?” 

MacCready couldn’t hold back his eyes from watering. “I…” his voice broke. 

Nate stared at him, then gently wiped a tear away. “You probably had just as shit a time as I did,” he said and dug another cord out from under his shirt. This one he took off and placed around MacCready’s neck. “I’ve done bad things too, only I’m blessed by the fact that I don’t remember half of them.” 

MacCready’s trembling hand reached up to feel what was around his neck, Nate’s dog tags. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. 

“I’m sorry too.” Nate grabbed MacCready and pulled him into a hug and gently kissed the brand above his eye. “You’re not a bad person Mac, you’re just as good as Hancock or I.” 

“P-Probably not as good as Preston,” he tried to choke out a laugh. 

“I don’t think anyone’s as good as Preston.” 

MacCready pressed his face against Nate’s shoulder and neck. “You probably would have fought them all,” he said and gripped him a bit tighter. “You wouldn’t have watched.” 

“I’m also an idiot,” Nate gently reminded him. “A headstrong idiot who thinks he’s invincible with a couple of stimpaks. You did your best, and I’m proud of you.” He could feel MacCready shaking. “I was disappointed and upset at first, I had always hoped you weren’t a part of what happened down there.” He started to rock a bit and rub his husbands back. “I heard the horrible things the survivors told me and I reacted poorly to your words. I know you, you’re a good man.” 

MacCready pulled away and wiped his face on his sleeve. “I should have told you sooner, I shouldn’t have kept that from you. Especially knowing what it means to the people you work with every day. I was just… so ashamed. And I have to face that shame every time I look in the mirror.” 

“Now if that ain’t some relatable shit,” Hancock said. The ghoul had backed off while Nate was apologizing but now he inserted himself back into the conversation by throwing an arm around MacCready’s neck. “I know the feeling; the mirror is my personal battle too. You ain’t alone in this, remember that.” 

“Thanks, I will.” 

“And Nate, next time you decide to interrogate one of us, give some fucking warning ok?” 

Nate said a bit embarrassed, “I’m sorry I just… As the General sometimes I get-”

“Well we’re not your Minutemen,” Hancock said curtly. “We’re not some raider, or ruthless cutthroat in the wastes. We’re your husbands. We didn’t pitch a fit when we found you crouched over a dead body chowing down, so we expect the same amount of respect here. I won’t stand for that kind of shit.” 

“You’re right,” Nate said simply. “And I put us all at risk by taking our attention off the road and off the wasteland. It was a dumb move. I should have more self-control. There’s no excuse for my outburst.” 

“Good then we’re all in agreement. No heavy shit in the wasteland, these are private conversations.” Hancock swung his other arm around Nate and pulled him down a bit. “Come on now, lets head out, there’s still a lot of road to cover before Jamaica Plain. Flip on Diamond City Radio, we need some walking music!” 

“Oh, absolutely.” Nate adjusted his dial off Radio Freedom and turned it to Diamond City instead. “Who’s up for some Uranium Fever?” 

“I still can’t believe they sang songs about nuclear shit,” Hancock said. “You guys really were hurtling towards your own doom. Pretty crazy huh Mac?” 

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “Pretty crazy.” He broke off from the two and walked ahead of them. 

Hancock called out, “Mac?” 

“I just.. I need some time to think.” 

Hancock and Nate exchanged looks. “Later,” Hancock said to Nate. “Talk to him later, alone. I think there’s still some things that haven’t been said.” 

Nate nodded and Travis’ hesitant voice filtered out of the speakers on his Pip-Boy. “And n-now for a uh, a sadder song. Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall, wow what a mouthful huh? Ha ha. Anyways the song.”  
Piano notes drifted into the air and Nate looked ahead, first at MacCready, then at the crumbling houses off in the distance and the weeping remains of an interstate. “Into each life, some rain must fall…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so it's been over a year since this updated and I'm sorry about that.  
> This chapter was supposed to contain way more content, but I decided to cut it in half and post what I had done now and put the rest in another chapter. This chapter came out at 27 pages and I felt bad about going forward with my original idea of doing a 50 page update. That's not fair to the eyes haha.
> 
> I know for a fic about a cannibal Nate this update had a lot less people eating than you were expecting, but I assure you the next chapter will have all the gruesome details. As the title implies, this is the calm before the storm. 
> 
> I also introduced a headcanon or two with MacCready. I have always felt like his past with the Gunners wasn't ever touched on enough. I wanted to put some actual weight behind his choice to join up with them and run with them. He's a skilled marksmen, there's no way he wouldn't have been promoted through the ranks enough to get their tattoo/brand. And I like to imagine the slaughter at Quincy was what made him leave the Gunners for good. MacCready made a bad decision and it follows him through his life.
> 
> Also Diamond City totally doesn't give a shit about Hancock, he gets in so often with Nate that they just sigh and walk by. 
> 
> I promise that the next update won't take over a year. There's a lot of fun stuff next chapter, a lot of bad things happen to Nate in rapid succession. I hope you stick around. Like always, I love your comments, they mean a lot and I would love to know what my readers think. Was this chapter too slow? Too boring? Ok?  
> Also if you want to check out more Fallout work I've done I have a wing au and a gill fic on this profile. I'm also writing a Dishonored wing au if that's something you're into, and a longform adventure story about the horror game Outlast.


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